I wonder

I wonder if you whispered the sweetest nothings in her ear
If you caressed her so gently
Leaving your soul bare
Or if you took her passionately
Fiercely and rough

I wonder how she touched you
With her fingers and her lips
If she kissed the mouth that I had
So many times before
If she wrapped her arms around you
And held you close and tight

I wonder how your heart felt
against her naked chest
While mine was slowly breaking
Thumping endlessly,
Without rest
While my mind was thinking of you
Crying tears for the lack of you

I wonder how I didn't know
I wonder how I'll survive now that I do
I wonder if my heart has sustained too much damage
To truly ever feel whole
And if my mind will ever be sane again

I wonder and
I wonder
A never ending cycle of wondering
My mind has caged itself
In a pool of confusion and
Utter heartbreak
Why, oh why
Can't I escape