Life is Like Ketchup

a metaphorical look inside a fractured mind

I am the essence of shame

Lies have been told (they’re always told)

In order to ease the recriminations attempting to reap my soul

But their waspish stings have ravaged my heart leaving me for dead!

 

Unfeeling and stone cold

The retaliation of my own pride and indignation

Are nothing, NOTHING

Compared to the truth (they couldn’t handle the truth)

 

This cataclysmic world I’m trapped inside

Has left me angry and misguided

There is no right, only wrong

But is it fact or fiction?

 

My skin fillets as smooth as butter

At the touch of a plastic knife

The veil of pain must fall to the floor so I can fly away

Returned forever to ash and sand, oh sweet deafening bliss!

 

Each day I beg to die!

But God’s irksome voice keeps coaxing me,

"Just hold on.”

I’d love it if the tears I shed would form a river in which I could drown.

 

The culminations of shame and rage have finally lead to this

I’m stuck on a proverbial cliff starring into the abyss

My heart has been swallowed by darkness

It’s telling me I must let go

 

Truth be told (lies, they’re all lies!)

Letting go…

It is the only way

To raise the curtain for the next act of this show

 

Blinded by the bright lights I am forced to see

I’ve rode an elevator to Heaven

But since my wings have been charred crispy and black

They won’t allow me to stay

 

God,

The irony

The unforgiving repetitiveness of life’s lessons just go to prove

Life, is not a box of chocolates

 

Life, is like Ketchup.

 

Author's Note

This was originally written in 2006 so the writing is very juvenile is some parts compared to my other writing -It's gone through several intense rounds of review as it was a journal/blog entry. But I felt the message was important so I pulled it off the shelf and updated the content. Thanks for reading and reviews are apprciated!

Reviews

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

The last stanza and last line are the strongest of the piece in my opinion. I sense a lot of angst, searching and a little anger in this one, which is actually quite interesting in its own right.

Technically, I like the form and flow, it felt good to me throughout. The only little issue I had was perhaps that you repeated yourself quite a bit, just in different ways. I think this could be cut down just a little bit in order to make it pop off the page a little bit more. Overall, though, I enjoyed the piece.

[Kristin Lee]

Thanks. It's hard to revist works that stem from very emotional points in time. This was originally a blog/journal piece written in 2006. Life was VERY different and yes, I was very angry and angst ridden at the time.

The repetativeness probably stems from that scattered frame of mind. But the constructive criticism is definitely taken to heart as I strive to revamp these old writtings and make them into something great while maintaing the overall message.

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

Kristen, this takes me back to my days as a teen.....Oh God, they were hard. I am so glad I am still here and that I chose to hang on and that you did too. Excellent read.

[Kristin Lee]

There are times in life that are so difficult! If I could speak to the girl in this poem I too would tell her to just hold on. Life does get better. For everyone who can relate I hope they get to where we are...the point where they can breathe. Thanks for reading :)

[Astro]

If I could have spoken to the former, or more juvenile voice in this poem, I would have tried to point out that, the repetitiveness of life, may only seem unforgiving because perhaps they are caught in a loop, where a lesson is to be learned and until then, they may be doomed to relive it. Also, 'shame' is a whip, but it is a whip we flog ourselves with, not others. When our whipping becomes habit, one day the cuts will bleed us dry, or force us to call for mercy, that sometimes violent sort. But life can grow beautiful in so many places, that if they find themselves feeling contained and stuck (like a bottle of ketchup) let the warmth of possibility be the hand that helps you escape to a place where the whip can be put down, and the paintbrush taken up, to bring color to such dark times. On the critical side, I think you have done well all around with your updated version, and I like how you mix in the voice, and the inner voice by the change in font, or use of brackets. I hope, the smile in your picture means that you have learned that lesson, I spoke of learning and are at peace with your earlier demons. Great expression.

[Kristin Lee]

Yes life lessons...proverbial and otherwise have been hard learned, but learned indeed. I cannot and will not ever pretend to have had an easy life and much of that reflects in my writing. But the one thing I hope always shines through is that I have survived, and not beause I was forced to. I have always chose to rise above...in the end :)
Thank you for the comments on the critical side as well. Visiting the pieces from my past is both a challenge mentally and artistically because I can see good vision but the emotions in my words kept the thoughts from being clear. There are more pieces from my past to come. I hope you will take a look at those with a critical eye as well. As I have conquered my demons and I think that's part of what helps make them shine.
Thanks for the support!

[Astro]

You are welcome, I am glad to hear you are tempered by the flames of life and rise above to fly upon the warm updraft.