Chess

It started off so simple, so harmless. As if the stars and the moon collided in a brusque moment of beautiful commotion, we had once more become the core of each other’s lives. Once more I could let myself fall beneath his charm, a hostage to his affection. Once more I was warned. Once more I didn’t listen. But I never thought it would come to this, moonlight dancing off the edge the knife, crimson pooling down below. I pull away, terrified yet exhilarated all the same and proclaim my deed aloud. “I have done it, yes, I have finally won the game.”

---

The warmth of the day rains down upon us, the sun’s sweet glow gently kissing the earth. I’m seated and waiting on the sidewalk cafe, wondering whether I’ve just made a mistake. “I shouldn’t have done this. This is wrong, all wrong,” I tell myself repeatedly. But just as I come to my sense of walking away, a familiar voice calls from behind me, freezing me in my place.

“Second thoughts,” the stranger inquires, placing a heavy hand on my waist.

I swallow, intimidated, although I’m not sure why. “Actually, I thought you were the one having second thoughts,” I reply. Still from behind, I can feel him moving closer to me, lowering his face just above my shoulder.

“Why would I want to miss this chance, again?” His tone sweet and cool, taking away the heat of the world in a single breath, mesmerizes me, and I know that I am hooked. He releases my waist and slowly makes his way in front of me to the opposite chair. At first I cannot see him; the sunlight has flooded the streets and drowned out the only thing I wish to see. But as he steps into the darkness, the silhouette is brought to life. For the first time in three years, I see him.

He runs his hand through thick, brown hair, amber eyes radiating love and insanity. He leans back in his chair before taking a slow sip of whatever concoction the bartender had made. Enthralled by his assurance, his beauty, he’s cast a spell without saying a word, a fact he knows as well as I. He leans forward and rests both elbows on the table.

“It’s a game,” he says.

“A game? What’s a game?” I question.

“Sarah, this. Us. This is the game.”

I know he’s right. Our prior relationship had ended for this very reason. Both headstrong and unpredictable, neither of us willing to lose. “You’re right,” I agree, “but maybe this time...there doesn’t have to be a winner.” He grinds his teeth casually, eyes slightly squinting beneath the pressure of the thought. I can feel the chill that’s pouring from his mind, numbing every ounce of my body.

“Okay,” he responds.

“Okay?”

A smile spreads across his face. Or is it a smirk? “Okay.”

Content and confused, we rise from the table hand in hand, and I can’t help the feeling that the game has only just begun.

A movie is playing in my bedroom, yet all I here is the murmur of the frail, technological voices, voices as frail as my own. James comes sauntering out of the room carrying a box. Of course, I’m already aware of it’s contents, yet I let him explain nonetheless.

“You’ve kept this? After all these years…” His voice trails off into the air as he seats himself beside me, rubbing a steady hand atop the tin compartment. Calmly, he undoes the latch, revealing two long, thin snake skeletons. Their bones remain the width of skinny toothpicks, but resilient, nonetheless. The fangs are still compacted within the jaw, perfectly intact. Underneath the thin frames lays a piece of paper, which James promptly unveils and recites.

“He rules the world but only by night, once the glow of the day has set. Out into the open, the serpent roams free�"”

“Vowing to take the breath of all who dares intrude,” I finish. James looks me dead in the eyes and faintly raises the corners of his mouth.

“You remembered,” he says. I shrug. Although my memory is a compliment to himself, it’s a reminder to me: a reminder of a promise I had made to myself. On the day I had received the gift of the reptile remains, James and I had been at the fair. But it wasn’t a typical fair with cotton candy and kiddy rides and laughter. This was a show, a menagerie of all the glorious monstrosities the world had to offer.

We had viewed the fair in it’s entirety, not missing a single moment. We strolled by caged wonders of nature, outcasts of society. The Homme de Feu had juggled his flaming torches repeatedly, cheating death with every toss he made. The whole show was made for us, in the sense that it was derailed, deranged, demented. We absorbed every second of our time there; it wasn’t everyday we felt truly welcomed, truly at home.

However, in a quiet moment, James had slipped away from my grasp and off to another booth. Meanwhile, I ventured beneath a heavily laden maroon tarp. Inside was a petite, middle-aged women, who sat before me with her eyes shut. She was horrendous, a sight picked straight from a movie. Her tan skin sagged profusely, creating motionless waves of her face. The ivory that once filled her sunken mouth, had long since rotted away, leaving nothing but a single white tooth in an interminable black hole.

“Come forward girl,” the woman’s voiced boomed. She had not opened her eyes; how had she known I was there? I inched towards her and sat in the little, wooden chair that was placed at the table. Her eyes opened, revealing two glossed over globes. I gasped, fearful of the woman.

“The serpent will destroy you,” the woman whispered.

“What?” I asked, confused by her words.

“The serpent will destroy you, girl. The serpent will devour all you cherish. You mustn’t let the serpent win!” She screamed out into the world, her brows lowering in contempt. I was mortified. My attempt to scramble out of the tent left me laying on the ground, tumbled from the chair. I shuffled myself to my feet and ran out of the tent as fast as my legs could carry me. The force of the wind pushed me back, but I continued throughout the fair until I entered a clearing in the chaos.

Leaning over to catch my breath, I crouched beneath the shade of a bent willow. But when I looked up, I only wished to be back inside the tent, a place where my emotions couldn’t destroy me. In front of me was James, brilliant, charismatic James, entangled in the arms of another. Her long, black hair fell right above her waist, flowing backwards in the efforts of the wind. The look on James’ face was one I had seen many days before: a look of lust, a look of the game. He realized I had seen him, yet he didn’t move. Instead, he  remained tight in her grasp while piercing my heart with his gaze. I was destroyed.

Later that night he returned to my apartment with what he claimed to be a gift, a present of apology he had acquired at the fair. In that moment, I knew our game had ended, but I took the gift anyway. Minutes later, James was gone and I was alone with my broken pieces, my thoughts, and a little, tin box. I opened it only to find two long, thin snake skeletons. I finally understood, and I knew what I had to do. In three years time, I would unleash my greatest move…

James moves into me, nuzzling his head onto my waist. For once, I feel warmth, and I’m not fond of it. James is only capable of emitting bitter coldness into my realm of contentment. In this moment, I know something is wrong.

“I missed you, Sarah,” he says to me. I can’t handle his kindness; it only arouses a feeling of shame from a place within me I didn’t know existed. Promptly, I end the blissful mood by gently moving him away from me.

“You need to leave,” I demand.

James says nothing. He only glares at me, the redness of his eyes radiating that fiery chill, again. I no longer feel remorseful of my thoughts. In fact, I feel compelled. James rises from the couch and exits my apartment, silent all the while, an action I am truly grateful for.

I’m at at James’ doorstep, attempting to convince him that I really am contrite of my actions towards him last night. No easy task, but after what seems like decades of prying, he finally collapses under my will and gives into my wishes.

“We’re going somewhere special,” I tell him, guiding him to my car.

“Where particularly is that,” he asks in a manner more like that of a statement. He’s obviously in no way thrilled about the occasion, and he’s probably right not to be.

“It’s a secret,” I persuade him. “I can’t spoil the surprise.”

We ride together in silence, hiding underneath the shelter of the moon. Thirty minutes later, we arrive to a deserted area outlined with trees but filled with nothing but dirt and animosity. When his face lowers to the ground, I know he remembers.

“Why the hell are we here, Sarah?”

“I have something to show you, babe. Don’t worry.” I take him by the hand and guide him out into the clearing of the fairgrounds. The wind blows through his coarse hair, rendering him marginally flawed for the first time.

“I have a gift for you I say,” turning him around to face the willow. I stand behind him, making sure he doesn’t move.

“Sarah, come on,” he protests.

“Shh. I want this to be perfect.”

I take a step back, taking in the man who stands before me. Muscles taught, I can tell he’s tense, nervous. I love it, the sight of him living in fear. So confident in his motives, sure of his game, he stands before me cowering beneath an umbrella of fear. I know my role, and I must follow through. Not tonight or ever again will I let the serpent control me. Tonight, I am the snake charmer. Tonight, I will win.

I unveil the knife from my back pocket, something I had tried my best to conceal, and I succeeded. I lunge forward, piercing his heart the way he pierced mine: quickly and without mercy. His towering body drops to the ground, crumbling in perfect unity with the roots of the willow.

It started off so simple, so harmless. As if the stars and the moon collided in a brusque moment of beautiful commotion, we had once more became the core of each other’s lives. Once more I could let myself fall beneath his charm, a hostage to his affection. Once more I was warned. Once more I didn’t listen. But I never thought it would come to this, moonlight dancing off the edge of the knife, crimson pooling down below. I pull away, terrified yet exhilarated all the same and proclaim my deed aloud. “ I have done it, yes, I have finally won the game.”