Consumed

Consumed

A Poem by Bellarina
"

I hate myself sometimes. I feel I need to express it.

"

Consumed by my fear

 

Constantly fighting with myself

 

Not ever being able

 

To control my words

 

Flying off the handle

 

Such as a comet raging towards the Earth

 

My anger gets the best of me

 

Taking over my mind

 

Fighting fighting fighting

 

It's all that I ever seem to do

 

Breaking my own spirits

 

Ranting on and on to myself

 

Hating myself

 

For becoming what I am

 

It's the fear inside of me

 

Not being able to be accepted

 

Consumed by my fear

 

Constantly fighting with myself

 

Not ever being able

 

To control my words

© 2008 Bellarina


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Featured Review

Really liked the pace of this piece. You carried the emotions through it well. Pacey, edgy. The flow of logic works clearly and draws the reader on to read more.

I didn't like the line 'such as a black person in front of the KKK'. It just landed careless and way too awkward. I'd go for a personal reference. Take something from your own life. Personally, I wouldn't use race references unless I was writing about race. But that is only my opinion, other people may really like that line and find it powerful.

The honest tone of this write comes through to great effect. Credit to you. A quality write.

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Really liked the pace of this piece. You carried the emotions through it well. Pacey, edgy. The flow of logic works clearly and draws the reader on to read more.

I didn't like the line 'such as a black person in front of the KKK'. It just landed careless and way too awkward. I'd go for a personal reference. Take something from your own life. Personally, I wouldn't use race references unless I was writing about race. But that is only my opinion, other people may really like that line and find it powerful.

The honest tone of this write comes through to great effect. Credit to you. A quality write.

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


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1 Review
Added on February 22, 2008
Last Updated on February 22, 2008

Author

Bellarina
Bellarina

Raleigh, NC



About
I'm Sabrina. Recently turned 22 years old. I've been writing ever since I was a child but only chose to start keeping track of it at the age of 15. I tend to stray from magical based writings. They al.. more..

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