Quitting.

I'm holding my breath here, 

like i'm stuck beneath frozen ice 

in a lake laced with poison. 

I'm drowning, 

burning, 

screaming, 

dreaming. 

I'm wishing 

for happier times 

and soft singing rhymes. 

Like rhymes from a mothers lips, 

spoken into the innocent hair 

of a child. 

A sweet, 

young, 

naive 

and stupid 

child. 

I want to undo this, 

undo the rope that's burning 

rows of malignancy

into my scarred skin.  

I want to untie the knots 

that have eclipsed my system, 

making felicity seem 

like a far fetched delusion. 

I can't though,

the knots that posses me

are far too vigorous,

much too unyielding

for a simple girl like me

who knows not the temptations 

of a certain desire

some may call

love. 

All i know,

all i have ever known,

are the feelings of

shock,

dismay,

horror.

And the cold,

always the cold.

Surrounding me,

drowning me,

confusing me,

compelling me to wonder endlessly

into the dark corners of despair. 

The cold keeps me locked up 

in cages of iron metal,

cold to the touch,

and bent beyond repair.

There is no key,

no release;

at least, 

none that I can find.

God knows I've searched

beyond the lines,

beyond the little light

seeping through the blurred, 

blue ice

above my head. 

God knows I've bloodied my fingers

in too many attempts

at clawing my way out,

too many attempts 

to free myself from this prison.

Freedom, i find,

is the one,

solitary thing

I so desperately long for,

even though,

in my head,

I know it to be useless. 

Just like my struggle for air,

my struggle for life beneath this blanket

of hate,

is, in itself, useless.

I know 

there will be no freedom

for me.

No felicity.

No innocent rhymes

or musical chimes. 

I know

what lies in the rest of my days,

I know

what will captivate me 

until my dying day.

I know 

it wont be pretty,

or nice,

or gentle.

And I know

that I,

despite the cold,

will have enough strength

to reach that day,

knowing all along that the cold

must end eventually. 

Reviews

[Danielle]

What a great piece, I feel as though this was wrote for my soul. Absoluely spectacular!!!

[Calypso]

I can just feel the desire to escape, and the coldness of the ice.

[Perfect Mistake]

Creats a very vivid picture throughout the whole poem. Tells an amazing story along with it also. Good job :3

[Lily Mae]

I agree with Victoria.. the use of the "trapped under ice".. says it but allows you to feel it..xo excellent write and keep breathing life into your words.. you do it with such great talent and ease..xo

[victoria]

a write that captures an inner struggle very well, very expressive and descriptive, in your use of 'trapped under Ice'' the reader gets a sense of the oppressive suffocation you feel in this well crafted write.

[forevermore1218]

this was really eye catching and I liked how you particurally formatted it so it came out more dramatic. Loved this poem

keep up the good work :)

[Boy of the red]

Don't change a thing it's really good. Keep writing.

[Emrys Realmskip]

Omg.. long poem BUT... AMAZING poem! :)
Great work!:)