Running from a monster

I don't know if i like this or not. defintitely not one of my best, and I dont usually write poems in this form. idk, tell me what you think

my friend was tough

my friend was brave

my friend is resting

in her grave.

 

she'd always try

to jump and fly

she'd always try her hardest

not to cry.

 

her wings, once white

so full and healthy

despite her fast fading light,

had begun to lose the fight.

 

she ran so far

as far as she could go

but was knocked aside

by the monsters blow.

 

it attacked her at her weakest

and despite her detest

it would not let her rest.

 

my friend was gone one day

the monster would not let her stay

under a rock of gray

is where i found her as she lay.

 

why wouldn't he let her be?

now she is no longer free

soon, i know, the monster

will be after me.

Reviews

[Kyle]

I like how this one is layed out. Its easy to read and it flows nicely. Well done!

[Katie Marie]

I really like this one Olive :P
This kind of reminds me of myself in a way...or at least how i used to be....especially the second and fourth stanzas
Anyways, this was a great poem, even if it isn't your normal style of writing. :)

[....]

Such a powerful read, strong emotions mixed in this. Nicely done

[paradise]

very emotional write great job keep em coming this poem is great im sorry you have to go through this

[Brook Hughes]

U may not write this form of poetry but u sure did an awesome job at it:) I absoulutely loved this poem and the ryhming was amazing:P Keep up the good work Kohleen ur doing great!!!:)

[Chrissy]

Good love write.

[Between the grey]

I really like this write, It is very relatable

[Team_Jaward_Gale]

I can REALLY relate to this

[Sophie]

I love this, I don't think you need to worry about it not being good, I love it!