what did i do?

what did i do?

A Chapter by Olive Belikov

I'm walking through the school, looking for someone. i don't really know who it is im looking for until i find him; my little brother. But there's all these other people in the hallway, girls i think, and a couple boys. there all around my brothers age. and then it comes to me, where at cheer-leading tryouts for the middle school kids.
" you have to be as flexible as you can, kay? and try to be fast and springy, but not too bouncy." i tell my brother, fixing his shirt and spiking his hair.
"Okay! go wait in the stands" he says back and gives me a slight push.
i'm nerves for some reason, i can feel my heart beat thumping inside my chest and in my head. my hands are shaking and for some reason i feel fear coursing through my veins. almost like something bad is about to happen but i don't know what. Or like i know but i just can't - won't think about it.
and then i'm outside in a pavilion, and there are houses on the other side of the street. i can see one house, its white, some what small. but it looks so used, so worn. a small yard is in the front with three stone stairs leading from the house to the grass. i stand for a moment, transfixed with the house. I've seen it before, i think. but then im running, i need to find Konnor, my brother, before something bad happens to him, where can he be? all these other grown ups are running around looking for there kids, its frantic. i think there's a fire, or a shooting, maybe the buildings collapsing. 
I see Konnor, sitting over in the small yard of the white house; just sitting there crying. im running to him now, and in the side of my vision i see another girl/ woman running towards my brother. Were racing each other, but she's running faster, like she's more desperate to get to the child. i look back to the yard, and i realize that the child sitting there crying is not my brother, but instead Riena's baby girl. Riena, i know her from somewhere. 
i'm confused and scared now because i can't find Konnor. Where can he be? Back inside the school maybe? but i don't get the chance to look for him because i'm in the dark, a dark so dark the fear in my veins explodes. and then i can hear the screaming. a girl, two girls, screaming in pain, somewhere in the dark. Is it me? am i the one screaming? Riena, she's there, she's one of the two girls; i just know it, but i cant help. Then there's a crack in the darkness, but the light that comes through it is red and evil; the color of a fire burning. and then the darkness is gone, i'm fine, but why am i hiding? 
I'm in a house, hiding behind the railing of a balcony, looking down at men walking through the house, calling someones name. There's one man in particular that i pay attention to the most. He's tall, nicely built. but he gives off the feeling of home. He's the father, i think, the father of the little girl who was crying in the yard of the white house. But he's not calling her name, no - he's calling mine, and i'm hiding. Why am i hiding? what did i do? i feel like crying, on the verge of tears, i feel regretful, like i've done something bad. i want to answer his call, to give in, but im scared. 
then i give into the temptation of his voice calling my name. I stand beside him ready to face judgment. He's leading me into another room, a room where i now realize i heard the screaming come from. i also realize that it was not i who was the second girl screaming. no, not i, but instead it was the little girl - Riena's baby. 
On a table, in the middle of the room, lay two bodies. two discarded, saddened, and burnt bodies. One is so much smaller than the other, so innocent. Dear God what have i done? it was i, i know, who did this. i caused this horrible thing. i killed them. 


© 2011 Olive Belikov


Author's Note

Olive Belikov
i told you i didn't know what i was gonna have to write, but i'm not gonna sugar coat my dreams. and i told you not to expect what you read to be happy and pink. there my dreams but i can't control them, sorry.

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Reviews

This definitely sounds dreamlike....is there any type of follow up or sequel to this?

Posted 12 Years Ago


Woe...... That is serious drama and intensity. I'm glad mine are just wierd instead!

Posted 12 Years Ago


Wait, did you really dream this when you were sleeping? Wow. scary dream... but the way you wrote it was wonderful.

Posted 12 Years Ago


wow, powerful. This describes the changes in setting and feelings in a dream so well, I am amazed by how you did it. This is awesome! Wow, can't wait to read your others.
~Chey :)

Posted 13 Years Ago



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Added on September 19, 2011
Last Updated on September 19, 2011


Author

Olive Belikov
Olive Belikov

MT



About
I am a daughter, a sister, a grand-daughter, a niece, a cousin, a friend. I am a partner, a student, a young girl, and a grown woman. I am confident and scared, terrified and excited. I am loving and .. more..

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