Dawn.

A collective thought process that came to me tonight, ah the inner workings of one's mind.

Slight weight pressed hard upon me,

Those eyes of pain stare forth once,

A shiver of pain slides within my throat,

Relax you snivelling retentive ponce.

 

Light dims the morning calls for us,

No screams link I to he just yet,

My face is locked in resentment no fear,

So stupid the lenghts one goes for a bet.

 

A sign of stopping creeps over the night,

Pain flexes it's right to stay with the dead,

Hate fills the hearts of solemn victims,

Lay down in blood soaked sheets, one bed.

 

Minds wander to the oddest of places,

Praise hope left in fields of bright fawn,

The whisers stay with us in the cold,

It's alwasy darkest before the dawn.

Author's Note

As alwasys be honest.

Reviews

[Larry Dyson]

liking the inter juxctiposition of animate and emotional..."

Minds wander to the oddest of places,

Praise hope left in fields of bright fawn,

The whisers stay with us in the cold,

It's alwasy darkest before the dawn."
well said Sir!

[Everett DeValle]

Dark, vivid, yet eloquently spoken from heart and mind. A very enjoyable read.

[Crow]

If I must be honest, then I must be trure to myself...I found this to be a piece full of imagination and wondrous beauty and truth.

[Lane-roe]

A thought provoking topic crafted with great structure and imagery-hats off to you :)

[Tate Morgan]

The dawn the dawn Oh How i DREAD IT EVERYDAY THINKING i MUST ECLIPSE THE DAY BEFORE

[PrincessZeldaWannabe]

Really interesting and makes me think!

[Poetic Beauty]

This lets the imagination run wild and many times it is the darkest before dawn or can be the darkest at dawn. Great mind provoking write.

[Tkess]

Nice write. This has a nice rhythm and great flow. One thing though, second stanza last line should be lengths.