CLOUD!

I've been thinking of war - as a state of society and how it affects us, this is my collective thought.

Clouds fill cells craving times once gone,

Clear skin holds tales as old as Adam,

Counting nuggets of gold along the way,

Clicked fingers to passers-by can’t fathom.

 

Loud noises heard miles away are here,

Leaning forward for them to see me cry,

Left side, right side, which side is right?

Lonely men standing tall wait to die.

 

Outrage at women taking up arms in haste,

Ordinary life’s changed forever in time,

Ousted secrets seem frivolous don’t they?

Old generals must now come to terms with their crimes.

 

Under earth we bury flesh we once ate,

Usher the new man to tell us old commands,

Uprising's are coming we all know it’s true,

Unite my darlings I beg of you makes demands!

 

Doubt creeps in forever no matter how clear,

Desolate thoughts scratch temples to defend,

Double your efforts he told me or face your foe,

Deals made will never stop the inevitable end.

Author's Note

Enjoy and be honest.

Reviews

[quarintine_deathangel]

If you believe as far as Adam then you know the human race failed once XD the end is only inevitable if we don't wish to change it. Fight forthe good instead of mourning the evil and corrupt it's "The Good Left Undone"(Rise Against) that we should really consider. One of my personal favorite parts in the Bible is revalations when it explains the seven churches. Each was right in it's own vision but had a tragic wrong. I see it as a realization and humbling more than depressing, it says what not to do y'know? Inspiring and motivational I guess :3 so yeah if you wanna check that out..Revalations 1:4-3:22 it's interesting to analyze even if you aren't a Christian. Hope that helps! As always thankyou for writing, I love reading your work ^.^

[Rene Velez]

the turmoil and destruction of a society is an ugly thing, some much wisdom untouched in the world, sad indeed....nice one Thomas.

[Ravyne Hawke]

War is brutal and I think you bring that out clearly in this cleverly crafted acrostic piece. My favorite line:

Old generals must now come to terms with their crimes.

Wonderful job dear, as always.

[Commanda Panda]

Four rights make a square. Four lefts do the same. Squares have right angles. We should all spend a little more time with our head in the clouds. All too soon we will be laid beneath the earth. We spend way too much time being mundane. With my own interpretations I feel this piece and dig it.

[Ruth]

Unite - yup...I live for the day that the fghters themselves drop the scales from their eyes and cease to fight for causes unjustified and engineered, great write hon :)

[Brandon S. Whitten]

You conveyed the concept brilliantly. A timeless piece. Splendid read and write.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

Thank you x

[Jack Cassidy]

I enjoyed the ending a great deal, it finishes very strong.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

Thank you x

[Friday]

Every line is very delicate and well worded. A wonderful and mindful piece it seems to me. Thank you!

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

Thank you for the review!

[Friday]

You're most welcome. I was a little brief though I suppose, in comparison.

[Priscilla Sayers]

As I am always honest to a fault, I must first say... Oh how I've missed you!
Secondly, as always your amazing insight is revealed once again as you give the perception of how what is will be, what comes will and must, you can face it or run from it but it is sure to come....
It gives so many paths to thought, so many ways to be interpreted that there is no "Right", only what is.... Bravo Thomas! Love it!

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

thank you x

[Priscilla Sayers]

Always a pleasure to read your thoughts, sweet Thomas.
XX