i think i am a houseplant

i think i am a houseplant

all i've ever wanted was for someone to plant me

to watch me grow

i've tried to set roots in the driest of soils

begging for water

begging for anything

letting people who've been known to cut their grass too short

be the ones to tend to me

i never knew i had it in me to demand more

to say "this soil isn't for me

this is not my home"

to uproot myself and go elsewhere

and i finally did

one day i decided enough was enough

only to find myself in another window still

sure i get water now

this soil is much richer

but the sun still burns me

a new freedom but still lacking something

nobody to move me from the sun when my leaves are scorched

or to trim my dry, dying branches

i'll admit to staying here too long too

a home lacking care is still a home

again, i'm afraid to take that step

to uproot myself

to risk drying out in search of the next place

it feels selfish to do so

what if i'm missed?

forgetting the fact that i'm wilting

what if it hurts?

ignoring the dull slow pain of drying up

what if i feel alone?

avoiding the possibility of having to feed myself

of having to search for my own pot and window

of having to propagate myself for a while

i've tried to turn people into gardeners

to wait and see if they'll realize

i'm choking

even now, i remain on a window still

where i no longer belong

just waiting

waiting for anyone

waiting for hope of a new start

waiting for something to happen

it's hard to want what's best for myself

especially if it involves knocking my pot down and running

with no promise of another garden

that being said, you are a gardener

no doubt about it

whatever responsibility i've hoped

that my presence would instill into anyone

i already see in you

you passed my window once

i felt something then

i wasn't sure what, but i felt something

i should've hopped out of my place that second

and ran and ran

but i didn't

i apologize if this is a projection

i apologize for not uprooting myself sooner

but if you'd pick me up

plant me

water me

and care for me

i will absolutely bloom

and do everything to make it worth your time

and i hope you know

if you find yourself on my window still

i will check on you

care for you

return the favor

without having to be asked

Reviews

[YanZeros]

Thanks for sharing this piece, When that plant mature and knows what she wants or needs. This reminds me of the poem The Little Plant by Kate Louise Brown.