i'm sorry

I picked up the bra hanging dangerously off the edge

of the bed, quietly tugged my sweater over my head

so as to not wake the hungry, lumbering beast whom

with my shivering body, I had regretfully fed.

In a bathroom that was not mine I winced

at the abrasion, I felt the rawness within.

You ask yourself where he had mastered such

persuasion - or when you became so weak to sin.

And now to the angelic smile you see on your screen

you break down in tears because you can’t

explain what you mean or look him in the

eyes because you’re scared he might cry-

but he smiles and says

“I love you no less and you’re still mine”.

And why do you take the ones who love you for granted;

why do you throw away the gifts you’re handed;

claw at the arms that shield you from your fears;

burn the fingers that wipe away your tears?

Trace your thumb where one had choked

and the other had kissed, 

recall a soft breath in your ear

and another one’s hiss,

and when you roll restlessly in bed

and feel the bruises on your leg

I hope you remember the way he held you in his arms,

the way he played with your hair, the sense of calm

he instilled in you, the sound of his laughter,

the smile that makes you want December to come faster,

the smell of his clothes pressed right up against your nose-

when you’re laughing with him, who knows where time goes.

Tonight I hope you remember the angel you were sent

because I only wish you had remembered him then.

Reviews

[ReedWrite]

This is a hard read. There's a lot of pain here.
The story is told with understated passion, that pulls the reader into the words before you're ready for their full impact. Nicely done.