Pathways

They called her sanity; purity, said she could do no wrong,

She was raised the right way surrounded by bad influences,

She did everything everyone expected of her to do,

She followed the rules,

Spoke with cogency,

And was well-mannered,

She was surrounded with dirt and debris but she made the best out of every situation,

As no one could’ve done,

Everyone expected that of her,

That which she portrayed through the simplistic things she does,

Her mind; not so simplistic as you might think it is,

Her mind was a raging thunderstorm; the claps triggered by anger,

Her mind; a thunderstorm; the rain triggered by tears,

Her mind; a thunderstorm,

Her mind was a tornado; a hurricane; a tsunami, all of Earth’s natural disasters rolled into one nightmare,

She was a slave to herself,

No one knew,

No one but the people she let the knowledge loose to,

Sometimes her seams aren’t as tight as it is usually,

When it’s not and she’s been crying one too many nights; the rainstorm loose in her brain, she finds herself a person,

Usually it’s the same one she’s been talking with for ages and that persons gone all weary,

Faded,

Worn-out,

She has been through this with that person; the person saying the same things each and every time,

She feels alone,

They called her sanity; purity, said she could do no wrong,

She was perfect in every way,

Everyone expected only the best out of her,

So naturally, their expectations grew higher as she grew with age,

Their words always a barricade as she tried to learn,

As she tried to rise above herself,

As she tried to read the words in front of her, she realized everyone was staring at her,

Wondering about her motives,

Each and every eyeball was glued onto her like a summer dress laced with human remains,

Manure, feces; the entrails of a corpse,

After a while, she got tired,

The same words chanting over and over again in her head,

She grew fatigue and so she stopped in the middle of her voyage to take a break; rid herself from the voices she’s heard constantly on a loop in her head every night, making its way into her dreams and shaping her in every way; driving her insane,

The constant praise and chatter and gossip grew into a tumor in her mind and she got carried away for a while,

She realized something while she stopped for a break; she had two choices,

She took the easy way out; listening to them, letting them control her,

So she dipped her toes into that for a while just until she could figure out what to do,

But the constant chit chat would sometimes wake her up in the middle of the night and force her to think about the good things she’d be missing out otherwise,

It would be a distraction; the chit chat,

She thought about the path she was walking on,

She thought about the twists and turns on it that she created,

She got curious,

Wanting to know what lay there, she went astray but she came back before any real damage could’ve been accounted for,

She was walking, you see,

Out of the darkness, a hand crept up lovingly against her back and cascaded down her long being, twisting itself around her ankles and pulled her down from below,

That’s when the only thing she was thinking about was the darkness,

The twists and turns she grooved in one the sides of her pathways when she got bored,

She made sure to key in only on the areas she hasn’t touched yet such as opposing views; resistance; homosexuality and what it is, these she ordered of the darkness to explore for her,

Darkness; calling it this would be a stereotypical thing to call curiosity,

Everyone loves blaming something,

Why not curiosity?

She wanted to change; to do the things even she wouldn’t dare do,

But her resistance was far more advanced than her learning,

She wanted to change, but she wasn’t obliged to sacrifice her innocence,

Force was implied,

Force had to be implied for the change to take place,

So it was,

She was locked up tight in a tower far north,

Where only she could see the heavens,

I took her place,

Me; the one, whose curiosity is at a high all day long,

Me; the one, who’d do almost anything for a taste of the sky,

I’m only carrying out her wishes,

I’m only doing everything she’s asked of me to do,

What wrong is implied of obedience?

I am curious,

And I do want to learn everything she never got to,

She put that priority on me,

She told me to explore those areas of hers she never got to,

With curiosity comes trouble,

Trouble holds no boundaries to me,

I’d do almost anything for my desires; my priorities diminished when she left,

Limits are only for those who are scared of the consequences,

I am not a jellybean,

You can bend me so hard and I won’t break,

I will snap back up with even more resistance than ever before,

You can do with me what you will,

Say to me what you will,

Distill in me what you will,

Inject in me what you will,

Whisper to me what you will,

I’ll still do everything I can to oppose you, unless your intentions match mine.