Virtual Meeting

I'm sorry, if I've ever made you feel anything but my love, then I am sorry.

Because that's all that I've ever wanted you to feel, my love.

And I'm sorry if sometimes I lose my mind, talking nonsense to you, wasting our precious memory, the one that we'll remember, always.

But the conversations that held meaning to us, those words that we threw back and forth to each other, those won't EVER  go away, or leave my memory, not because of what we did, but because of what you mean to me: and you mean more to me then you will ever know.

Your face, perfect in every way, yet, maybe you don't see... the things that I see.

Your love, I swear to the sky, I won't EVER take for granted.

Because you mean more to me each and everyday, and I know that, that kind of love feels suffocating.

but I swear to the sky, and this heart of mine, my intentions are clear, and suffocation-free.

When will I see you... My heart is beating quite fast... The rules, crooked as they are, I must follow them... this... this suffocation, rules twist around my neck like rotted vines and constrict me of my freedom... constrict me of my... right to live, as a human being.

And I love you, I never would have known you, had it not been for my curiosity... The first day... the wind swept me away, nothing could be salvaged after that terrible gust of wind knocked me down to my knees, and this was before you, I would say to you, staring into your eyes, smirking slightly, but just slightly.

 You see, in 6th and 7th grade, I was a nobody, a clueless in a crowd full of clues, but one thing I knew for sure was the fact that my heart was lonely.

You came at just the right time though, and I was outside, siting.

My memory is a bit faulty, I would say, It's just a little fuzzy because the only thing that I was focusing on at that time was you.

Do you remember, to me the trees seemed like a huge umbrella, covering us in, the sounds only a reaction to the reactions of the world.

And the wind that was blowing that day, wasn't strong enough to sweep you away from me. I had my eyes on you for a while, too shy to even utter a word to you, but when I regained what I had lost, I remembered the things my classmates had taught me, everything about love, crushes, relationships, heartbreaks, I listened to them all. 

I tried for a second marking, to somehow get it through your head that I was interested, but it didn't go pretty well, or maybe it did.

Do you remember the things I told you, the things I hardly remember saying?

I say this because, I was trying to tell you something.

Something I've been feeling.

I wasn't able to remember what I told you because the way you looked at me, maybe it was my imagination, but as I was saying those words that I was saying to you, I was thinking of something else.

I was thinking of something else because I knew I needed to think of it before time slipped away from me, the way it does SO many times.

I think about time so often, it seems as if Time & I, are actually lovers, but naught, simply allies.

...

So now I know you're wondering: What DOES all this mean? Aren't you doing it again? Rambling?

The answer is: No, I am telling you everything that I've always wanted to tell you.

Everything will make sense, once you've read it over, and after a certain time, call me a lunatic, but as Billy Joel once said, I might just be what you're looking for.

After a time, it'll all start to make sense.

Author's Note

That took a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD off. I'm sorry if my wording is not good, sometimes, I think of someone, and thoughts get stuck as they're being filtered out.