Live Now

on the spot; Anon; wing

i was scared

and afraid

i heard all the yelling

i knew i had to get out of here

but i didn't want to scream again

i didn't want to bleed again

i knew my tears would stream when

the sleek whip comes out again

the words they used to hurt me

slice me in too deep

until my morality seeps out

i could never speak out

my chains are too heavy now

the fire is burning quite loud

raging 

with a new sound

she yells

her words like angry clouds

rain falling

like acid now

on my face

burning my eyes out

making me scream now

they never had faith in me

never really saw that in me

they thought i'd be history

never knew i'd make history

for the ones

who never knew

words

words

that meant everything to them

words 

that i never knew how to use

i always thought my fate was sealed

never to open again

but then i saw a new open window

and everything lights up again

all the words

i'm hearing

makes me mad

tones

are not level

i need something i had

once

i had something

but now i can't even find it

i wanna yell

stop

that's my mommy

that's not how to speak with her

i don't like the way you sound

when you'e up there in your cloud

listening to the weariness 

that the world brought down

there's nothing left in this hollow life

left where this 

put a smile instead of drowning yourself in a pit

of broken dreams

where are those teeth

that showed me

how to beam

bright

like fire

isn't that your desire

shut up and watch the world spin

watch me in my royal tin

can that i can use

to make everything brand new

if you only opened your eyes

and saw the beast inside

you would learn to become a better person

stop yelling

smile

smile

if you only smiled

you'd only save

but a while

to realize everything is where they should be

there is no reason to show cheek

listen to mama's advice

put away the gun and the knife

you'd learn you're a better person and not put up a fight

coz you only have one life

if you waste it

you're done chasing 

that black gold

blue rose 

pillow at night

so stop frowning

stop being down in

the deep

surface up

you gotta live now

and live it up

Author's Note

this is a rap; poem