Okay . . . here’s how it is. After reading a short history on Robert Lowell’s later poems while lying in bed and drinking a cup of coffee, I open the window blinds.
The morning light is subdued, hesitant, not really gray as in so many accounts. Though there are no shadows--- only dark spaces, details are slowly blossoming.
From across a light slate sky, the rising sun in the east is kissing the face of the western moon, making it blush brightly as it sits on a tree top--- the tree---not the moon, just turning green.
I’m surprised at my awareness of such things---due to a deficit of solid sleep. My aging brain, and the manic, overweight woman living above, pacing her room all night, each step sounding like a small caliber pistol firing as the floor cracks beneath her weight, puts me at odds with the coming day.
But I’ll manage somehow. Don’t let it bother you. Feel concern, instead, for the woman upstairs, whose sense of the morning must amount to something like a blur.
I'm with you every step of the way, here, my friend! Last night the noisy Hispanic neighbors who live three families & many jalopies to one dwelling, were fixing a loud truck at midnight, filling the ravine with an hour of rumbling! I love how your poem starts with gentle morning observations then slowly descends into a barely-smoothed grudge against the upstairs neighbor. As at the end of your poem, it helps to consider difficulties on "the other side" to dispel grudge-like feelings! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie
well done sense of scenery in this write juxtaposed with the emotions melded very nicely in this one I do that to myself all of the time try to climb into others skin before rashing the rage of annoyances doesn't always work but in this case seems to have worked swimmingly! Nice place to be kentuck:)
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
Bunny,
Yeah, doesn't happen all that often for me either.
Thanks for stopping by. read moreBunny,
Yeah, doesn't happen all that often for me either.
Thanks for stopping by.
T
Ha. The end is the thing that will shake you out of your complacency. Pity for the unaware. But in all truth, I have lived, briefly, in the same situation as you and heavy footed dinosaurs from up above can be a constant concern. Especially below the bathing area.
I enjoyed your play on words and descriptions in this work. Like your writing style. I hope you have a good day. CD
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
C.D.,
Thanks for your kind words. Much appreciated.
T
Tom, your concentrated, real-time poetry here gives us a an eloquent glimpse into your daily life. You draw Hemingway-esque moments and characters indelibly for us. Amazing write, bloody perfect with that caveat at the end. Enjoyed this immensely.
I love how you slow down time for this small bit of reflection. You have layered so many details in this moment.
And..
As I spend my lunch hour listening to the rain your poem goes very nicely.
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
Always something about the sound of rain!! Thanks for stopping by Cherrie.
T
The silent vision of the sun in the east
kissing the face of western moon"
lovely to behold compared to the
overweight noise disturbance s coming
from above..well penned piece here..
A wonderfully descriptive take on your morning, with a straight forward way of engaging the reader. Your concern for the overweight woman abusing her floors, more than concern for your own sleeplessness stands out. I feel the plight of both in this piece. Simple in style but very readable.
Good to get your start with Leonard Cohen. I made my acquaintance with him in 1968 courtesy of a long ago love.
A good write, Tom.
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
Cohen, indeed was a great talent! The book I bought was published in '68. Ted, thanks for your enthu.. read moreCohen, indeed was a great talent! The book I bought was published in '68. Ted, thanks for your enthusiastic review; it is appreciated.
T
Good writing here, Ken.
Like those lines, they really expressed your expression very well.
It captured my mind as I read it along. And I like your wonderful description.
It's really enjoyable.
i love this poem...it makes me think of Plath and Sexton taking their poetry class from Robert...and how much their poems were influenced by him...maybe by him pacing upstairs in their minds...
the shots..the blur...the suicides...the martinis at the bar in Boston...
the weight of poetry that some don't get out from under.
this is really good, Tom...you take us on such visual journeys and allow us to feel so much with your poetry.
it is accessible.
to the common man and to the poet in us...
j.
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
"Like that "pacing upstairs in their minds," J. "Weight of poetry", an interesting comment . . . how.. read more"Like that "pacing upstairs in their minds," J. "Weight of poetry", an interesting comment . . . how do you mean my friend? Accessible is usually what I aim for, so thanks for saying so. Need to take a look at your poems again.
T
Very descriptive and interesting poem. I guess everyone starts their day in different ways.
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
Lee,
Thanks for the kind words. The one thing everybody has in common is we first open our ey.. read moreLee,
Thanks for the kind words. The one thing everybody has in common is we first open our eyes.
T
Started reading and writing poetry while in the Army many years ago. I picked up a book of poems by Leonard Cohen in a bookshop on Monterrey CA's Fisherman's Wharf and went on from there. I've had a n.. more..