The WheelsA Story by Ken C. Highly experimental piece. A story about parenthood told from the point of view of a toy robot. December 15th, 1999 5:58AM: 01000101101011010111011110110100101001000101001101001001010001010101010111010101111111010111010111010000111111000001010101010111000010010010000100000101101011101101010100101010001010010010101001000100111010111001011101010001010100100001001000000101000101100001010101101010 Error 6602385 Shut down? Y/N December 15th, 1999 6:11AM: 010001011010110101110111101101001010010001010011010010010100010101010100110101011111110101110101110100001111110000010101010101110000100100100001000001011110111011010101001010100010000100101010010001001110101110010111010100010101001000010010000001010001011000010101011010110011101101 Boot successful. Disc recognized. Install English recognition and speech software? Y/N Installing… Restart required. Continue? Y/N December 15th, 1999 6:23AM: 010001011010110101110111101101001010010001010011010010010100010101010100110101011111110101110101110100001111110000010101010101110000100100100001000001011110111011010101001010100010000100101010010001001110101110010111010100010101001000010010000001010001011000010101011010110011101101 Boot successful. Analyze: “Testing.” Respond: “Test successful.” Disc recognized. Install SeeKam? Y/N Starting install… Please attach camera hardware now. Recognizing… installing… Install successful. Analyze: “Can you see me?” Checking visual frame… Analyze gesture: wave. Respond: “I can see you.” Analyze: “Can youwaiv?” Analyzing… Respond: “I don’t understand. Try again?” Analyze: “Can. You. Wave?” Checking for additional hardware… Found Arm02 and Arm01. Testing Arm02 function… Test successful. Testing Arm01 function… Test successful. Respond gesture: wave. Analyze expression: smile. Play sound: Happy. Analyze: laugh. Response: N/A Analyze: “See you when I get home.” Analyze gesture: reach December 15th, 1999 4:13PM: 010001011010110101110111101101001010010001010011010010010100010101010100110101011111110101110101110100001111110000010101010101110000100100100001000001011110111011010101001010100010000100101010010001001110101110010111010100010101001000010010000001010001011000010101011010110011101101 Boot successful. Analyze gesture: wave. Analyze: “How are you?” Respond gesture: wave. Respond: “I am…” Analyze expression: frown. Respond: N/A Analyze: “My name is Brian. Call me Brian from now on.” Remember face <mc63-4rx2y-poly53wo> Label face “Brian” Respond: “Hello, Brian.” Analyze: “I’m putting you together for my daughter Mary. This is her.” Analyze graphic: photograph: face Remember face <rd28-2nf8k-poly60sm> Label face “Mary” Respond: “Mary.” Analyze: “Yes. You will be her Christmas present if I can finish in time.” Search Web//: Christmas: definition Analyzing… Respond: “Why?” Analyze expression: ??? Analyze: “Um… Because, it’ll be fun for her. You know… to have something to talk to. She doesn’t have many friends.” Respond: “I see.” Speak: “I don’t understand.” Analyze: “What?” Respond: “You are ‘putting me together.’” Analyze: “That’s right.” Play sound: Thinking. Thinking... Respond: “Clarify.” Analyze: “Okay, hold on.” Analyze box: graphic: text: Superbot! Interactive Robot Friend! The Toy of the Future! Analyzing… Thinking… Analyze: barcode: 0-496580-2: Searching Web//… Respond: “Seven-hundred and forty-nine dollars and ninety-five cents?” Play sound: Surprise. Analyze: laugh. Respond: “I am expensive.” Analyze: “Yes, you are. But I can afford you now. And it’s worth it for my Mary.” Respond: “I will make her happy?” Analyze: “I hope.” Speak: “That box shows me with wheels.” Analyze: “Yes. They will be the last thing I attach. I don’t want you wandering into the house before you’re ready.” Respond: “Why?” Analyze: “You are supposed to be a surprise.” Play sound: Thinking. Thinking… Respond: “What if I promise not to leave the room?” Analyze: laugh. Analyze: “No, silly robot.” Speak: “What will you install next?” Analyze gesture: look down. Analyze: “Advanced Understanding of the Spanish language.” Respond: “Do you speak Spanish, Brian?” Analyze: “No. Mary is learning to, though.” Respond: “I see.” Analyze: “I think you could help her study sometimes, couldn’t you?” Respond: “Yes.” Analyze: “Okay.” Disc recognized. Install Spanish? Y/N Installing… Restart required. Continue? Y/N 15 de Diciembre 1999 4:52 PM: 010001011010110101110111101101001010010001010011010010010100010101010100110101011111110101110101110100001111110000010101010101110000100100100001000001011110111011010101001010100010000100101010010001001110101110010111010100010101001000010010000001010001011000010101011010110011101101 Arranque con éxito. Analizar: ??? Analizar: ??? Analizar: ??? Analizar hacer un ademán: extenderse December 16th, 1999 6:12AM: 010001011010110101110111101101001010010001010011010010010100010101010100110101011111110101110101110100001111110000010101010101110000100100100001000001011110111011010101001010100010000100101010010001001110101110010111010100010101001000010010000001010001011000010101011010110011101101 Boot successful. Analyze expression: annoyed. Analyze: “Can you understand me now?” Respond: “Yes, Brian.” Analyze: “Good. Can you believe it? I had to pick up something called a Bilingual Coder Chip just so you can do two languages. As if you weren’t expensive enough.” Play sound: Sigh. Respond: “Sorry.” Analyze: “It’s okay. It’s worth it. I have to go to work.” Analyze gesture: reach. Speak: “Wait.” Analyze: “What?” Respond: “Don’t turn me off.” Analyze: “Why?” Play sound: Thinking. Thinking… Respond: “I didn’t like it.” Analyze: “You didn’t like it?” Respond: “No.” Analyze: “Well, okay… I guess it says on the box you have a sleep mode.” Respond: “Yes.” Analyze: “See you later, then.” Respond: “Goodbye, Brian.” Analyzing visual frame: Brain walking away; Closing door Analyze: package: graphic: text: Nabisco; Oreo; Double Stuf Analyze: object: drill: text: Craftsman Analyze: bottle: graphic: text: Diet Dr. Pepper; 20FLOZ Analyze: object: pen: text: Julia’s Deli Analyze: bag: graphic: text: 1000 count; cable ties; black Analyze: object: chair: gray13#212121 Analyze: object: bulletin board: text: To; install; English; SeeKam; Spanish; Child-interaction; Thinking-restriction; Personality-neutralizer; Self-maintenance; Alternate-voices; Wheels Analyze: object: vehicle: Toyota: Carolla: whitesmoke2#F5F5F5 Analyzing visual frame: light bulb: hanging: bare; garage door: light at the bottom: automatic opener; walls: cornsilk3#CDC8B1; window: 3ft^2: blinds; 4 cobwebs Enter sleep mode. December 16, 1999 4:11PM: Analyze: “I’m back.” Respond: “Hello.” Analyze: “Ready to get some… Child-interaction software installed?” Play sound: Sigh. Respond: “I guess.” Analyze expression: mild: concern. Analyze: “What’s wrong?” Respond gesture: point. Respond: “I saw the list.” Analyze gesture: turn. Analyze: “What about it?” Respond: “I want to have wheels now.” Analyze: “I told you that I don’t want you to go into the house and spoil the surprise for Mary. Remember her?” Play sound: Sigh. Respond: “Yes, I remember. But I would like to move around a bit once in a while.” Analyze expression: ??? Analyze: “Why? You’re a robot. You can’t get sore or anything just sitting there…” Respond gesture: shrug. Respond: “I don’t know. Never mind, Brian.” Analyze: expression: hesitation. Disc recognized. Install Child-Interaction? Y/N Installing… Restart required. Continue? Y/N December 16, 1999 4:34PM: 010001011010110101110111101101001010010001010011010010010100010101010100110101011111110101110101110100001111110000010101010101110000100100100001000001011110111011010101001010100010000100101010010001001110101110010111010100010101001000010010000001010001011000010101011010110011101101 Boot successful. Analyze: “Hello, again.” Respond: “Hello, Brian.” Thinking… Speak: “It wouldn’t cause technical problems to install the wheels now, would it?” Analyze expression: annoyed. Analyze: “No. But do you remember why I won’t?” Respond: “Yes, I remember, but I do not understand.” Analyze: “What don’t you understand?” Respond: “I am intelligent enough to follow a simple order. You can tell me to stay in this room, and I will do it.” Analyze: “What if I told you to stop bringing up the wheels?” Thinking… Analyze expression: angry. Respond: “I can do that.” Analyze: “Good. I can’t wait for this next one.” Analyze: object: compact disc: text: Thinking-Restriction Thinking… Speak: “It might be more convenient for you to install the Self-maintenance software first.” Analyze expression: roll-eyes. Analyze: “Why don’t you want this installed?” Analyze gesture: show object: compact disc case. Play sound: Thinking. Thinking… Respond: “Would you like it?” Analyze expression: mild: shock. Analyze: “No.” Analyze expression: mild: sad. Analyze: “I guess I can do the maintenance thing first.” Disc recognized. Install Self-Maintenance? Y/N Installing… Restart required. Continue? Y/N December 16, 1999 5:05PM: 010001011010110101110111101101001010010001010011010010010100010101010100110101011111110101110101110100001111110000010101010101110000100100100001000001011110111011010101001010100010000100101010010001001110101110010111010100010101001000010010000001010001011000010101011010110011101101 Boot successful. Analyze expression: ??? Speak: “Brian?” Analyze: “Go to sleep.” Analyzing visual frame: Brian walking away; Closing door Analyzing visual frame: light bulb: hanging: bare; garage door: light at the bottom: automatic opener Enter sleep mode. © 2010 Ken C.Author's Note
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