[untitled]

its depressing and personal... so gentle with critism.... umm i know there are tons of mistakes in it but i don't like to read this one so i didn't proof read or revise or blah blah blah....

 

you catch yourself crying at times

and it's never when it should happen

it hurts to see certain scenes

scenes that would make another smile

but you can only frown

a mother and child

it is a bond you couldnt have

and it burns to know you wont

no matter how much you wish she wont be there

she can't wipe away your tears

she can't lesson the pain

and she can't say she's sorry

you can only watch

imagine what it must be like

wonder if you would take her forgranted if you could

not only her absence hurts you

her death sits on your subconcious heavily

greif hits randomly

and u always wonder

was she scared?

you were too young to remember her now

and it makes it worse

you owe atleast that to her

and you try so hard to give her that

try for yourself

memory brings comfort

but you can't have that

you'll live with the knowledge that she existed

and that hurts worse

there's no answer in it for you

just that you can't have anything to comfort

you only get that sickening empty feeling

that knowledge that your missing something you'll never replace

something you're sure existed

Others mention her

you smile

it hasnt hit you yet

you dont know if it will

you've grown good at hiding it in the back of your mind

but bottled grief has a way of escaping when you are alone

no one knows how vulnerable you are

and no one can console you

because they cant possibly understand

you dont want them to

its isolation and its yours alone

you dont want anyone to see it

because you know what they'll do

they'll tell you she was a great woman

She was beautiful

you look just like her

that's worse

youd be happier not knowing

the images people build make you want to remember so much

You watched a video once

a home movie

you thought it would help

if you couldnt remember then atleast you could see it

and then you wished you hadn't

because seeing you with her is crushing

because you smiled at her

and she smiled back

 

Author's Note

very personal. gentle with the reviews please.

Reviews

[Legion]

This made me cry. AND I DON'T CRY! I feel your pain. Just remember, even though she isn't there now, she loved you then (and I would imagine still does). You lost something so precious that couldn't be helped. That is where we differ. My mother left on her own when I was a baby. Didn't want to be a mother. You should never forget your mother's love for you. I never had mine. In that you are blessed beyond belief. Great write (even through the tears).

[Andrew Glass]

This is something else. I really don' t know what to say in a review about this piece. It's a well written piece, I can tell you that. However, a review isn't the place to discuss personal feelings, so I'm going to leave it with good work. You really know how to convey emotion.

[speakingcolors]

This is so full of emotion. I love it. It nearly brought me to tears. When you describe watching the movie and seeing her smiling back at you, I felt it in my heart. Great work and I look forward to reading more of your stuff. Remember not to underestimate yourself.

P.S. Too bad we can't rate it, I'd have giving it a 100. Don't feel obligated to change that though, I think I understand why we can't.