ice water

The walls are closing in around me

I'm sinking in quicksand.

I'm floating to the bottom of the ocean

with cinder blocks tying down my ankles.

I'm struggling for every last bit of breath 

while all around me I get to stare bleakly 

at the smiles of satisfaction.

They laugh as I open my mouth to breathe,

only to be greeted by ice water

swimming through my lungs.

I try to ignore their laughter

and the voices in my head

but right now they make me feel so small

and all I want is for you to hold me

but you weren't here when I woke up screaming

and pretty soon you never will be at all

Author's Note

any reviews are highly welcome!

Reviews

[Lydia Shutter]

The changes in margin were very effective in this write. The imagery is excellent. I could almost feel myself being pulled down to the bottom of a cold pool of water. Very emotive. Lydi**

[Kelsey Rogers]

Thank you so much Lydia!

[Rana]

Three pieces of imagery in the very first stanza, all emphasizing that one feeling, it's very impactful, also as it proceeds to reveal more of the why and what, specially the last line. Loved it.

[Kelsey Rogers]

Thank you!

[....................]

oh, that feeling of drowning or wanting to drown... i felt my body tremble with the icy cold water... love the displacement of stanzas; it's as if they were drowning with the speaker.. nicely done

[Kelsey Rogers]

thank you very much!

[....................]

you are welcome...