The Life In Between

Her heart had stopped.  In all the ways a heart could stop.

 

Don't let them win, she told herself.  Even though the odds were against her.  Even though it wasn't looking good.  She figured she would die soon, but she was determined to fight to the end.  If it meant she would be able to see David again, she would fight to the very end, and beyond.

 

Her skin was on fire, and she couldn’t move.  Paralyzed and frozen on the current, as they would say, she was unable to let go.  The alternating current had been placed in her palm, leveraging the muscle contractions to secure the contact.  Involuntary convulsions rocked her slender body and forced her tiny frame to lock into a singularly prone position.  Her smoky-green eyes were closed tight against the pain, her long blonde curls now fried and frayed from the electricity.

 

The lightning-fast impulses told her brain to stop listening to the normal transmitters, to stop reacting to the normal signals.  The shocks told her brain to stop all normal function, muscles, lungs, heart.  Everything was now stopped.

 

But Keira was still there. 

 

Even in the nothingness, in the stillness of death, she was still in there.  Fighting, thinking, searching.  She was working to keep her mind active, recounting as many facts and memories as she could.   She had to stay sharp.  She had to stay focused.  Keira feared that any mental downtime would cause her to lose her grip on this world.  And she wasn’t ready to let go, not yet.

 

So, she quickly bounced around and in between each of her memories, bold old and new.  She remembered the walks on the beach with David and his amazing blue eyes.  She remembered how David had been ripped from her arms in the middle of the night.  They both had been taken away from their beautiful home and brought here to this place.  Keira had been thrown into a dark room, separated from David, and that was where she waited each night for them to come for her.   Keira thought about how her life was no longer her own.

 

She had always heard rumors about these secret experiments, but nothing had ever been proven.  Keira certainly had enough proof now, but she had to survive this horror in order to tell others about what was going on.  Even though she realized she would probably never again see the light of day, she continued to reluctantly serve as their test subject, biding her time.  She had to be patient in order for her plan to work.

 

As it had been explained to Keira when she first arrived, their experiments sought to test the endurance of the human body and its ability to transcend consciousness into a new state of reality.  Wealthy patrons, diseased and dying, were paying for a way to escape death.  As a result, black market research had powerful investors with deep pockets who were only concerned about the end game �" regardless of the human cost of their experimentation.  And the combination of infinite funding and finite timelines created intense pressure to deliver something soon.

 

For the most part, they had failed to produce any convincing results, so every day they increased the amps.  Every day they increased the pain.  And every day they waited longer and longer before bringing her back to life.

 *****

“It’s been 60 seconds, let’s get it going again.”

 

“It’s ready.”

 

“Ok, shock her.”

 

Pain and fire exploded through Keira’s chest.

 

“Keira, are you there kiddo?” the raspy male smoker-voice asked.

 

“She’s got a normal rhythm,” the timid female whispered.

 

“Good," Smoker-voice said.  "So, today we got up to 150 mA, correct?" he asked, followed by the sound of scribbling on a clipboard.

 

“Yes sir,” Timid Female replied.

 

“Great.  Take her back to her room and let me know when she wakes up.”

 

“Yes sir.”

 

Keira could hear and feel everything, but she tried to keep still, with her eyes closed and her breathing steady.  Trembling, but slowly recovering, she wanted them to think she was still out of it, so they would leave her alone for now.

 

She had no intention of helping their research by giving them the information they were seeking.  No way, Keira thought, as Timid Female wheeled her down the hallway.  No way would she tell them about her conversations with David. 

 

She would never admit to them that every time her heart stopped, she could hear his voice.

*****

“Please,” Timid Female begged.  “You have to give him something.  Anything.”

 

Keira shook her head slowly, as she ate her lunch that had been placed neatly on the silver tray.

 

“If you don’t, he’ll just keep increasing the amperes.”

 

Keira shrugged, with a smirk.

 

“You’ll be dead soon, really dead.”  Timid Female looked down at her shoes and sighed.

 

“That’s funny,” Keira giggled.  “There’s now a difference between dead, and really dead.  I thought that only happened in fairy tales.”

 

“He’ll keep making the shocks stronger,” she whispered, and then turned to leave, hesitating with her hand on the door handle.  "Eventually, we won’t be able to bring you back,” she said, and then locked Keira’s door behind her as she walked out.

 

But that was exactly what Keira wanted to happen.

 

It had started a few nights ago, when their trials had reached over 110 amps.  They had waited only 10 seconds before shocking her heart back to life, but she had heard it.  David was calling for her.

 

The next day, with no documented results, they had increased to 120.  After 20 seconds, they revived her, but she had heard him again.

 

By the fourth night, up to 140 amps, and 40 seconds of death, Keira had been able to respond to David.  In the dark quiet, they had whispered to each other.  David had said he was looking for her and would never stop until he found her.  Keira had agreed to do the same.

 

Then last night, Keira was convinced that she had been able to walk around in the world that lingered between life and death.  She had been able to see shadows forming in the dark.  She had talked with David.  She had been able to smell him, to sense him, to almost but not quite touch him.  But then, as always, the electricity callously jump started her journey back to the white room and back to the cold table.

 

Every day, they had increased the current and every day she had been brought closer to David. 

She was now decided.  She would not stop until they were together again, for good. 

 

And Keira was hopeful about tonight.

*****

“You need to pay attention,” Smoker-voice said in frustration.  “We need accurate results on these tests, so we can monitor the loss of brain cells.”

 

“Your concern is heartwarming,” Keira said sarcastically.

 

“It’s for your own good, kiddo,” he replied.  “Don’t want to leave you out there too long, or else you’ll be nothing but jelly when you get back.”

 

“Whatever.”

 

“Make a notation that the subject is being non-cooperative,” Smoker-voice said flatly.

 

Timid Female wrote something down on the clipboard and sighed.

 

“Tonight we’re going to accelerate the program slightly,” he said, placing his papers down on the table.  “You seem to be handling the trials well, and there doesn’t appear to be any permanent loss of brain function.”

 

Keira didn’t respond.

 

“So,” Smoker-voice continued.  “We’re going up to 220 mA and we'll probably leave you in that stasis for about 90 seconds.

 

Timid Female took a quick breath, but didn’t look up from her notes. 

 

Keira took a quick breath as well, only hers was based on glorious anticipation.  She thought this might actually do it.

 

He placed the rods into both of her hands that were strapped down under wide leather buckles. 

Her burns weren’t that bad any more, they had practically healed from the first night’s exposure.  Then the mouth piece was inserted so she wouldn't crack her teeth from the impact.

 

Smoker-voice turned around and began to fidget with the controls on the panel next to the table.

 

Timid Female looked up from her clipboard and into Keira’s eyes.  Goodbye, she mouthed silently.

 

Keira winked at her, just as the current hit.

*****

Keira could feel the ocean breeze on her face and instantly recognized where she was, even with her eyes closed.  The warmth of the sun greeted her and the fresh air filled her lungs as she took in a deep breath.  She dug her toes into the wet sand and smiled at the sticky, grinding, fluid sensation.

 

When she finally dared to open her eyes, she was awe-struck by the beauty and depth of the sunset welcoming her home.  The sky was painted as if by a child who wanted to use every crayon in the box.  The shimmer on the watery floor beneath the sun was blinding.  Sounds of the waves crashing against the shore again and again were deafening.

 

Keira turned to face the northern coastline and her hair blew into her face, briefly blurring her line of sight.  It was a pleasing and familiar sensation, feeling her hair whip around against her skin, tangling in her eye lashes, tickling her nose.  The movement felt good. 

 

When she finally reached up with her hand to move the curls away from her eyes, she saw him.

 

David was walking towards her.  His hands were in his pants pockets, with his shirt blowing loosely around his body.  He was barefoot, walking along the edge of the surf, and each wave surrounded his ankles as it came into shore, splashing up on his jeans.  He was smiling at her.

 

She stood motionless, almost not believing what she saw.  Is this possible?  She thought to herself.  Is this nightmare finally over?  She wondered if she was really back home, back home with David.

 

She didn’t say a word and she didn’t move her body, as he continued to approach.  He finally stopped in front of her, face to face, barely a few inches away, then reached up to touch her cheek.

 

“Hi baby,” David said softly.

 

Keira couldn’t speak.  Not that she was physically unable to do so, but she had no words to say.  Nothing could express what she was thinking or what she was feeling.

 

This felt so intense.  This had to be real.

 

David leaned over and kissed her softly.  She felt her body melt into his arms.  The familiarity of his embrace excited her and put her fears at ease.  It was really him. 

 

Keira kissed him back passionately, and then wrapped her hands around his waist.  Losing herself in the moment, grateful for the moment, she felt sure that this was where she was supposed to be.

 

Then Keira closed her eyes to brace for what was next, for what she was dreading. 

 

She knew what was likely to happen, so she waited for the inevitable.  She waited for the shock to jolt her back to the cold stone floor of her cell.  She waited for the pain to transport her back to that place.  She waited to be taken away from David once more. 

 

But the electric shocks never came.  There were no more mixed signals scorching her brain.  There were no more convulsions.  There was no more pain.  Either they weren’t coming for her, or she was far too gone for them to bring back.

 

The ocean breeze picked up and blew her hair wildly around her face.  Keira looked up at David, into his deep blue eyes and wondered if it could be true, if she was actually here to stay.  Did it work? she asked herself.  Did the experiments work?

 

David smiled at her and gently moved the loose strands of hair from her face.  

 

Or am I dead? she thought.  Really dead. 

 

Keira decided it didn't matter either way.  She smiled back at her love, once lost, but now found, never to be lost again.

Reviews

[Wendy Seames Garner]

This is very good, Kelli, an unusual premise for a love story. Scary to think that something like this could in the future.