Where hearts hurt(2)

A look into the people who try to make a difference.

Screams were coming from everywhere. My head was spinning trying to follow them. I was having a hard time breathing because the air was so heavy. There was little light and I can't see. Why can't I see anything. The screams were getting louder.

 

"Sam wake up, you are dreaming again."

Mack jumped back as I can up swinging. "What the F**k, Mack."
"Whoa, calm down, you were dreaming again."

"No s**t, I am sorry Mack." Settling back in my bed, I tried to relax. The dreams were not going away like they said they would. They seemed to be getting worse. We sat there for what seemed an eternity.

"Hey do you want me to make some coffee?"

"What time is it?" Looking around I couldn't find my alarm clock.

"About 5am, Is it that same dream again?" Mack said as he leaned over to pick up the clock and set it back on the night stand

"No.. yes.. I don't know. I have a hard time remembering them after I wake up. All I know is that they seem worse then before." I slid out of bed and headed to the bathroom before Mack could interogate me more. I think thats why he asked to room with me after what happened last year. Someone wants to keep an eye on me but I'm not sure who. Command or Mack or both.

 

As I walked down the hallway to the kitchen, I could smell breakfast. Cool he was cooking this time. All I had to do was drink my coffee and eat. Good start to a morning, especially after that horrible dream.

Coffee in hand I went to the study to get my reports for Command Center this morning. Funny thing is I don't remember finishing them and going to bed.  Must have been that bottle of wine I drank trying to get rid of the damn headache from that a*****e yesterday.

"Damn girl that looks like it hurt." A small snicker in his voice. "That will teach you to be the hero."

"Shut up Mack, and no it looks worse than it is, doesnt even hurt much anymore." Hoping he would not read my face and know I was lying. "I see you found a ride home?"

"Yeah, no thanks to you, I had to wait for Shane to finish up then he just had to drive the slowest to get here. When I finally got home you were out like a light."

"Yeah I dont even remember going to bed. But I guess I needed some sleep."

"Well eat up and then we will go in to Command Center and see what is up for today." Handing me my plate he disappeared into his room.

As we entered Command Center I could tell already something was up. Passing the guards and metal detectors, I headed right for my office to get some papers before going to the Cheifs office.

"Sam?"

As I turned around there stood Steve. S**t, not now I thought. With a smile on my face I walked toward him and gave him a kiss on the cheek "Steve good to see you. How are things going?"

"As good as can be expected. Listen we need to talk, do you have time today we could have lunch or something."
"Um... listen I would love to but I have a debriefing this morning then I need to do some paper work. How about I call you later this afternoon and we will go from there."

Smiling he argreed, thank god. I can't handle all this s**t at one time. I am going to lose my mind. Steve was a great guy but was to interested in having a family and I am not ready yet, we have only been together 4 months. And besides not after everything thats been going on here lately.

 

Walking down to the Chiefs office I decided to call him later just to put an end to this. I owe him that. I owe myself that. I need to work on a few things before I can commit again. Its just too soon.

"Chief, you ready for me."

"Yeah, but this will be quick, I have an appointment in a few minutes. So really all I need is your report, and ask you if you are alright." Moving around his desk, I couldnt help but smile at his round belly barely missing the edge. Chief was a good man, but sweets were his enemy. Not that I can say anything.

"I am fine honest." As I handed him my report, to my suprise he walked past me and asked Mack to come in and then shut the door. F**k this was not good.

"Mack tells me you stepped on lead yesterday, and before you say it yes I know you are his boss, but when he has lead he has lead period. Your little stunt could have cost a lot of people their lives. This on top of what you are already going through is not good."
"Sir, please let me explain. Mack was lead and yes I overstepped that and I am sorry, but there are things I have to work through. But you guys tiptoeing around me is bullshit. You wanted me back out there when I was perfectly happy behind my desk. So let me do my job. And Mack quit going behind my back."
"Sam we are not ganging up on you. We just want to make sure you are using your head the right way. What happened last year was hard on all of us, but you had and still have a long recovery to do. Have you come to terms yet that what happened was not your fault?" Sounding more like my dad than my boss he leaned over and took my hand.

"I have come to the conclusion that there was no other outcome then what happen. So No I have not come to terms with it because there was not an option to choose for that girl... or Jesse."
"Sam, Jesse's choice was his own not yours, everyone deals with demons there own way, I just want to make sure you head can handle those demons you have." He let go of my hand and stood up. That was it he was done talking and to tell you the truth so was I. "You might want to also know your woman from yesterday hung herself in her cell last night. So we still have an investigation to do. I really didn't think we were going to get anything out of her anyway, so now we are basically back to square one."
"F**k!" why cant people just own up to there actions. As I walked out Mack right on my heals I waited until I reached my office to turn around and face him.

 

"First of all when I let you move in as my roommate I thought we were clear on privacy, the next time you go behind my back to the chief I will fire you is that clear?"

"Sam, wait I only told him about yesterday that was it, dont turn this around on me, I am not the one walking around with a chip on there shoulder." Turning he stormed off toward the cell area.

S**t this was not going to work, he was going to have to move out. Maybe I could talk to Shane and Tom and see if they knew somewhere cheap he could go. As I went to pick up the phone it rang.

 

"Micals, how can I help you?"

"Hey Sam, how are you, it's..."
"I know who it is." I tried to sound calm, even though you could hear anger in my voice.

"Sam I need to see you, and I know you are still mad at me and all but this is important."

"Where are you?"

"At my apartment, I just got home from therapy and saw the news." He sounded scared and mad at the same time.

For what seemed like an eternity, I signed. This was going to happen sooner then later. "OK Jesse, give me an hour. I need to finish something up then I will be there."

"Thanks Sam, just come on in, don't knock I will be in the den. And Sam be careful."

 

Author's Note

Here is chapter two. Not to sure about it. ignore grammer.

Reviews

[Red With An Attitude]

Thanks Keilan, I fixed it.

[<3Lil.Bit(:]

Good chapter mom. Only one grammer mistake too.

~Skulli