The Necklace

A little essay about me reclaiming my freedom from a one sided romance that had no chance in hell of moving on pass me being the love struck pain in the a*s who batted her eyes with hope at a man who in truth felt nothing outside the fact that I was his b

  I stared at the clear crystal. Handmade by someone in a land I had never laid eyes on outside a few movie scenes. It wore the carving of a tulip. The craftsmanship so delicate. The chain it hung on slipped through the spaces of my fingertips. It wasn’t the one that it originally came with. That one had suffered a sad fate due to chubby fingers with a strong grip. This one was the last in the line of three that had once been some cheap two dollar special at a local Family Dollar. Still it was strong and served it’s purpose well.

  The crystal felt hard, cold, and as unforgiving as my heart had become over the last year. What once felt like a symbol of comfort and love was now nothing more than a sad reminder of what I could never have. My neck felt exposed without it. Outside my daily showers or summer swimming it had hung quietly since it had been sent to me a couple of years before. Just above the heart that belonged to the very one who had sent it.

 

  I remember the day it arrived. He had told me it was in there with a few stuffed toys for our daughter as well as a cute little kilt he had picked up at a Scottish festival that was taking place in the area. I even remembered when he told me he was attending it and asked me what I wanted. I think I mentioned wanting a necklace. A craft type thing like one would get here.

 

  So when the package had arrived I ripped it open. First I gave my daughter her dolls. Then I dressed her in her little skirt. Later on after everything was quiet I had opened the little box. It was so beautiful in it’s simple design. The very thing I would’ve gotten for myself if I had of been there. It came with a set of earrings. All three items shimmered as the light danced through it.

 

  I slipped it on and put the earrings away to only be worn on special occasions. I laid on the bed for hours. My eyes closed and my hand laying on the stone. As if by doing so would make it feel as if he were right there with me. As if I could feel his touch, hear his heart beat in my ear as I had when he had once held me, and could those sweet sounds of him breathing in and out as he slept. My heart felt over flowing with love for him at that moment. I read a hope for maybe a future for us into a piece of jewelry. Believing it to be a symbol of how much he cared.

 

  Just as the heart has a way of fooling the mind into seeing what’s not really there, time has a way of forcing the truth to come to light. Instead of loving me more with each passing day he went on with his life. Just as he had told me to do three years before when he left to that place an ocean away. His actions has proven that I am an afterthought that he wouldn’t give much thought to at all to if not for the daughter we share.

  I’m not bitter. Nor am I angry. He never made any promises. Actually had warned me not to get attached to him. I just didn’t listen. I allowed my heart to feel inspite all his careful warnings All I had left was the cruel reminder that mocked me every time I looked in the mirror.

  So I careful removed the necklace. Placed it back in the box it came with. I knew that I just couldn’t pretend anymore. I couldn’t fool myself into believing a lie. It was time for me to move forward. I wrote a simple note to go with it. Tied a pretty bow around it. My daughter would really love to have it when she turned 16. Knowing it was from her father would just make it even more special. For now it would sit in the family hope chest and I would move forward as I started my new journey of a life without him.

Reviews

[Scott W. Martin]

Nice piece. I liked the clean subtle descriptions used. I felt like it really allowed the story itself to effect me (the reader) instead of leaning on a lot of creative metaphors to drive it into the heart. Very enjoyable read and the ending made it more that worth it. Very good, almost bittersweet.