The Doves and Hawks

I'm sure the title says it all. About war and lies.

The doves just fly away

I only see hawks these days

But hey that's life anymore

Because you see she is now a w***e

 

Keeping to beliefs are over

Our expectations are now lowered

Our hopes have been shot

The doves are in stage rot

 

Its become our worse fears

Worse than the Trail of Tears

But what's really the cost?

Another damn holocaust

Author's Note

okay this is more of anti war poem. not directly to a certain war.
it's kinda like how Bob Dylan's song "Masters of War" was made before the Vietnam war. it's just a anti war song.

Reviews

[Chaoscaine]

The meaning is quite clear and the last stanza stands very well on it's own, but I would ask to reconsider some allusions and word choices for the sake of meaning and flow. Read it out loud; and if at any time your tongue trips and it isn't strengthening your point, try and re-write it. One specific; "The doves are now in stage rot". Rot is a powerful word on it's own, but the line itself is difficult to understand because of 'stage'. Unless there is another layer I don't see, I would write it simpler and dark; "The doves now begin to rot." It makes it simpler, but more impressive.
Also, allusions are important in this piece. I understand that doves are the birds of peace, but refrain from using the hawk. In times past, every time that the dove and hawk are mention together, it's usually in context of mating. Yeah. Perhaps a better bird of way is the falcon; elegant, strong, and used heavily in the past as a war-like bird. That and carrier pigeons, but they are not only extinct, but also aren't as neat.