She Isn't Me

I'm the girl with not much to say

My mind draws blanks, but i have too much to think

I'm the girl that's a cool fall day

The girl who wishes she could drink the night away

With the music up loud somehow my insecurities are louder

When the lights hit the floor so does my stomach

Because the girl I want to be is seen in her and her

Yet I stand here in the darkest corner unable to move

The darkness has my feet chained to floor

My demons cover my mouth and whisper,

"If only,"

If only i was the girl with the bright smile

If only I was the girl who could move carelessly on the floor

If only i was the girl who people didn't forget

Because I'm coffee shops and libraries

I'm stay at home and security

Everyone wants the girl who has an aurua so bright the sun doesn't compare to them

No one wants the girl who hides behind the air you breathe

I've painted a picture of who i could be

And I die inside when I realize she isn't me

I want it so bad, to be free

But i'll just sit here and dream with chains on my feet

 

                 { k.j. }