The Peephole-Girl

A description of truth...

The Peephole-Girl

As the Cherry tree’s blossom kisses and embraces the

 wind before his flight, so did her mitten upon the frost

 gilded pane. Her sight was vignetted through a

 murkiness of crystals. Nevertheless, her core concept 

was clearer than how true honesty would dress herself.

Through her peephole were four hundred people.

 Through her peephole, were two admirers.

By him, an action was made, an egotistical endeavour

 of having an enhancement of position, by which to sit

 by her side. By her, deep within, without her

 knowledge, it

 validated as an evil deed. By them, unfaltering love

 regrew the bond, and stitched back the seams.

A sigh lost itself to the Peephole-girl’s soul. A

 relationship that would continue, for decades to be

 seen, but would hurt and end at a ruined life of a

 being.

Her shadow peeped out from among the door’s beams.

 And as the bud of the cherry tree her eye appeared…

 Only a sliver, yet the vision of her soul stayed

 undeterred.

By her peep two lovers sat engaged, but through her

 heart two people sat in chains.

By his mouth, a boast detonated of attaining both his

 degree and a wife. By her mouth, her wish was to

 avoid all conflict and strife. Through their mortality,

 love regained those different sights and melted them

 into one.

An internal scream pierced the armour of the

 Peephole-girl’s soul. A love that would last long… An

 end of which hurt would gain supremacy.

Her body intruded, perverting through the dense hull

 of oxygen, as did the fruit, the fruit of the cherry tree.

 Her vision could perceive unto the deep unknown, her

 soul peeped out the keyhole of barred doors.

By her sight a married couple sat by each other.

 Through her spirit, a couple sat, a jackal squatted

 between their interlaced hearts, untangling the wool.

As his sentences verbalized, her dress was perceived as

 an obnoxious item. But all she did was clench her

 jaw… All she did was done by doing none. Love

 evaporated, ashamed of her stance… Never again did

 it appear. Neither did them… Together, as a blanket…

 woven.

Both girls were me. She foresaw the end, she foresaw

 the downfall, she foresaw the last blossom’s plummet

 to the barren earth beneath. How I wish I did too.

Author's Note

I wrote this for an Eistedfodd

Reviews

[Mrudula Rani]

I hope your story was received well at the Eistedfodd. The sentiments of young lady are truly touching. Forced relationship, almost like an arranged matrimonial. The cherry tree represents stages of emotions she endures!

[Write Cat]

Thankyou!! I am glad you got it

[Mrudula Rani]

You are most welcome.

[Norah]

The lines were difficult to read if you could just space a little when typing next time. This piece was full of accurate descriptions in which a reader like me would always prefer to see in the books they read.

[Write Cat]

It truly means alot...

[Silt]

I'm amazed by the depth of this. Actually I was shocked when your 'about me' stated your age, though I shouldn't be surprised because I have known young writers who far out-reach common-placed expectations.

My one regret is the font choice, though I believe part is in fault to the site's display.

But the imagery is breath-taking. I wish I had these skills, but I'm more of a meat-and-potatoes style. Still, appreciation comes freely to those who take time to look.

Thanks you for the read, and the experience.

Leap forward.

Best writing to you,

Silt

I know this is not much of a critique in writing terms but it seems this site deals more with the readers' pov, something I'm not used to, but for once, didn't mind at all.

[Write Cat]

Thankyou Silt!!! I will have a look at the font... It isn't the best... Thankyou for taking time to crit, everyones words come as an inspiration.