A Presence of Dexterity

I just wrote this one day when I was sitting in class...... Hope you enjoy

Her lips were pursed..... Her eyes so intensely focused on the fossilized chalk dusted black board that he already could see a wisp of smoke arising from her trail blazing stare. She followed every movement, every minuscule adaption that the pen brought forth was mirror imaged on her face. Oh.. How her eyes were radiant, they were like the tropical oceans. Those eyes reached deep down into the unfathomable depths, it felt as though he could see every square inch of them, inside and out. And he could see in there the lust that fueled her eternal thirst for knowledge. It was that same element, he realized, which know turned her eyes into a murkiness only seen in deep waters at the arrival of a storm...... her eyebrows rolled themselves into battle position and her skin contoured her body as it fell into the flexed muscle's crevices Her hand slowly but mightily drilled through the air, for the contemplating sum had filled the atmosphere with such a pressured presence of awe for brilliance. He could feel the influence of her hand, nobody breathed, not even the very atoms in the air vibrated.    

Author's Note

I soooo sorry for not writing so often any more. I had things going on. But now i am back!!

Reviews

[Norah]

This piece is well described and accurate. I could relate to the lines as I look at my professor the same way and I'm eager to learn. I would really like to read more of this!

[Write Cat]

Thankyou Nora!!!

[Anjali]

"turned her eyes into a murkiness only seen in deep waters at the arrival of a storm......"
This sentence is beautiful! I loved this... It feels so mysterious... I liked this whole piece... The way you've represented this scenario and the emotions, you can feel them... Absolutely amazing!

[Write Cat]

Thankyou Anjali!!!! I wwas really striveing for this one

[Anjali]

Oh I can see that... Keep it up!

[VALORMORE DE PLUME]

It is obvious that you have a way with words.
This ability is attractive to random stories that are, looking for a writer.
Stories prefer, unique voices, for their telling.
I started out this way too.
Storytelling, is being open to another world. A world where the stories live and flourish. If they like our style, they want us to give them life, in the land of humans.
Oral storytelling comes naturally for us. Emotion flows through body language, gestures,facial expressions, vocal tones, and eye contact. The listeners pick up on these cues and the story moves into their hearts.
The written word, for storytelling is quite a different set of skills, that require learning and practice. Structure is everything. Readers are not at all like listeners, I soon discovered. They don't get it, without proper structure. ie. paragraph formation (which separates thoughts), sentence structure, punctuation,etc.
These items fall under (editing).
When we write, everything is like talking to someone who is blind and mute. They cannot see our passion, nor tell us what they need to make it work better for them.
Considerable thought is required, on our part, to improve the experience for them.
Example; describe to a blind person, what the sunrise looks like or ocean waves lapping the shore.
This may be accomplished by statistical analysis.BOOREING
Instead; express by artistically painting with words, the scene, but more importantly, the feelings involved.
You, know this portion well. I applaud you.
There are many youtube vids on writing, that offer free advice at all levels. Some are from famous writers like Stephen King.
I see great potential in you.
Please, make a serious effort to learn this writing craft.
Being a great editor is way different than being a writer.
However, to be a great writer, we also need to be a great editor.
We (writers) all struggle with this.

[Christy the Poetic Hear..]

If I were you, I would write every single day. This was magical!! The wors you chose and how you combine them is wonderful!!!! Congratulations friend!

[Write Cat]

Thankyou so much, your review is beautiful, i am glad you liked it.

[Graceeee]

This is amazing!! You should never stop writing!!

[Write Cat]

Thanks soo much. It truly inspires me...