Adoption (babies look for their mothers first)

When I tell people that I am adopted and that I have a great family.

They tell me that I am lucky and then they think I'm living happily.

Was it luck that brought me onto this earth?

Oh no! it's just that if i wasn't adopted I wouldn't have the same worth. 

They tell me I'm lucky because I was adopted by a white mother.

The fact that you put adoption and race together shows me who you are, down under.

And the fact that you think that adopted children are lucky to be here shows me that you don't consider the burdans that we bare.

But let me tell you the real story.

Not every part of adoption is happy, not every part prevails with glory.

It's not even happy from the start.

Because every person has a different starting part.

Think about the mother sitting praying and begging next to her cross.

Pleading to god; Help me get through this tragic loss.

My husband just let me all alone.

And I cannot raise own daughter on my own.

But I wan't her to know that I care.

And that my love with follow her everywhere.

And at the exact moment!

There is a couple in denial

Because the doctor just told the husband that his wife is infertile.

And that's were the people think it ends.

They think that, that couple will about that baby and a new couple will start the cycle again.

But what about the child's thoughts.

Nobody asked her I guess they forgot.

When she goes to school the children point and say.

Are you every going to meet your "real" mother one day?

But would you consider her a mom?

If one second later she was holding you then two seconds later she was gone.

Don't get me wrong, I would lover to have my mother in my life.

And if you asked for another chance I would give it to her twice.

Because deep down that girl she craves to know her mother.

She wonders if her mother is looking for her? does she even bother?

And then she thinks that all she needs is a name

And if she had a name that would really change the game.

Because that name means so much right?

It would take her heavy heart and turn it light.

But once she gets that name

Nothing is going to change.

The last thing it will do is relieve her of her pain.

But she tries anyways

Hoping that she will find her one day.

Now she spends her days searching that name on the web.

Was that really her name is that what the papers said?

She's getting anxious because nothing is coming into her findings.

She's convinced herself that her mother is in hiding.

And now she hurt even more.

She even has convinced herself that she's the reason her mother walked out that door.

She needs to sit down and breath, take a breath.

It's ridiculous that she even considered that.

And this girl she actually has a friend who is adopted too.

Except her friends story contains not one single clue.

Her friend doesn't even know where to start.

She only know that place her mother left her laying in that cart.

Now the girl think shes a bad person for being mad at her history.

Knowing that her friend has a dead end discovery.

But none of this will ever be okay.

Even if they do find out one day.

Sometimes it better to live in your imagination.

To think that the mother you have created in your head is the real creation.

Because what if you meet her and you have nothing in common.

Except for your genes but half of those are her fathers.

And she hasn't started that search.

Babies look for their mothers first.

  

Reviews

[The Nude Writer]

Wow that is awesome :) Adoption is the only way I am going to have kids. You really wrote about it so well :)