Withering

Withering

A Poem by Vanessa Whiteley

 

Like a leaf waiting

to fall
out of her season; she sighs
- sees encircling buds
burst forth,
then drifts away on the breeze.  

 

 

 

© 2008 Vanessa Whiteley


Author's Note

Vanessa Whiteley
I changed the last line on this one 'she hangs on a branch that decays' as friends said it didn't make sense. Is this weaker?

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Featured Review

Hmm. Interesting form this Chofu (5-2-7-5-2-7). I"ll have to try it. Sad feel to this piece, Vanessa, but well done. It creates a soft flow. Especially liked the line "out of her season", and the almost envious look back at youth in "sees encircling buds/burst forth". Cheers!

Posted 17 Years Ago


8 of 8 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Hmm. Interesting form this Chofu (5-2-7-5-2-7). I"ll have to try it. Sad feel to this piece, Vanessa, but well done. It creates a soft flow. Especially liked the line "out of her season", and the almost envious look back at youth in "sees encircling buds/burst forth". Cheers!

Posted 17 Years Ago


8 of 8 people found this review constructive.

The most wonderful chofu ever!
wow. u r a goddess my dear.

Posted 17 Years Ago


9 of 9 people found this review constructive.

Now that's poetry, in any form. So sad, and yet, she's hanging in there.

Posted 17 Years Ago


9 of 9 people found this review constructive.


This is a rather beautiful piece. I really enjoyed reading it. Good luck on the contest..

Posted 17 Years Ago


9 of 9 people found this review constructive.

Ineffably dad Vanessa as though life has passed her by completely

Posted 17 Years Ago


9 of 9 people found this review constructive.

Wonderful, compact, circle of life poem.

Posted 17 Years Ago


9 of 9 people found this review constructive.

short and sweet but very sad at then... nice though

Posted 17 Years Ago


9 of 9 people found this review constructive.


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509 Views
17 Reviews
Rating
Added on February 8, 2008

Author

Vanessa Whiteley
Vanessa Whiteley

Bristol, England



About
Born in 1560 in Stratford-upon-Avon. I have a passion for writing but my parents wanted me to marry early. I ran away from home to see if I could make my fortune in London as my older brother had d.. more..

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