my person

I’ve been thinking a lot lately

I’ve been thinking about life 

who I am 

what I want to do

my passion

and my purpose 

It’s all a bit overwhelming

I know I’m young and I shouldn’t have all this figured out yet 

but not knowing bothers me

I need to have a plan

I need to know what I’m working for 

and I don’t know

I have no idea

That terrifies me

I like to act like I have it all figured out when asked 

but in reality I have no clue

I don’t even know who I am 

Not really 

I mean what defines who you are?

I know it’s not your name 

or what you look like

so what is it?

The concept of “me” is so hard for me to wrap my mind around

It’s such a weird feeling 

not knowing who you are

It makes you feel boring 

like there’s not much to you

But I know there is so much more to me than I can see 

I just need to climb deep into my mind and truly know myself 

I just need to find ways to reveal parts of who I am

I need to do things I enjoy 

find my passion

discover my talents 

and use them for the benefit of others

That’s all I really want to do

Do things that make me happy 

and help others in the process

But I feel as though my life is already so structured and time is so limited that I won’t have time to do the things I want to do

and the things others expect me to do

I go to high school 

then college

and then I start my career

soon after get married and start a family

That all sounds great to me

But where does traveling fit into that plan?

Where do year long mission trips fit into that plan?

Where do summers spent in little towns on the coast doing nothing but enjoying this beautiful earth god has placed me on 

fit into that plan?

How can I step out of my comfort zone and experience new things

if I’m stuck doing the same ole same ole?

If I could somehow fit all of this into my one lifetime

which I’m sure is possible

that would be fantastic

But I just feel like there isn’t enough time

I don’t want to spend my life going through the same stages as everyone else

I don’t want to be stuck at a job I hate

I don’t want to go through countless hours of lectures and studying

I want to go out and enjoy this big breath taking place the human race calls home

I want to meet new people

see new things

try new foods

and just embrace the awesomeness of this earth and everyone in it

I want to help people

find the less fortunate and make a change in their life

I want to bring light and hope to people who need it the most

I want to make this world a better place

I want to feel as though I can make a difference

After all, we only live once

Why would I spend my one life going through the motions that other people have established as “normal” and “successful”?

I am not other people

I am my own person

and even though I’m not completely sure who that is yet

I know my person wants to be different

And hopefully

by being different and doing a different thing

I can truly find myself along the way

Reviews

[A hare off]

I can certainly say you are off to the right start just by asking these questions of yourself. Most will just wait around and see what comes, accepting the mundane instead of going out and finding all there is to find. You seem to be on the right track to find everything you desire and in this process you will definitely figure out exactly who you are. Never let anyone tell you you can't do something. If you want to do it, then just go for it. Think positive and find your way with a smile and determination and you will be surprised at what happens. Very well written thoughts in your poem. Nice job.

[k.m.b.]

Thank you so much. That is very encouraging and means a lot.

[Coyote Poetry]

You have time to figure out your life.
"I am not other people
I am my own person
and even though I’m not completely sure who that is yet
I know my person wants to be different"
I told my kids. Travel, test life and have fun. Education is the key. A good life is doing what we want to do. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Wrenlane]

Dear K.M.B., In my youth, I used to believe in chance, luck etc. but for many years now I believe that the steps, the decisions, the choices in our lives are ordered by a loving Creator & Father who wants nothing more than to bring us back into His presence. Once you have determined for yourself what truth is and you place the anchor of your belief in the center of that truth, you will be tethered there for your entire life. That won’t ensure that you will not spiral out of control from time to time as you fall for, and into the different seductions that this world has to offer…odds are you will, but it is those life experiences, good and bad, that will cause you to finally see that light of truth beaconing from the celestial light house to guide you back home.

I have read all or your postings this morning and they are touching, endearing and intuitive. The one about your grandmother was especially poignant as your words made it so easy to see how much she meant to you throughout your life.

One of the stanzas in your poem “My Person” states…
“I need to do things I enjoy
find my passion
discover my talents
and use them for the benefit of others”

I believe you have found the beginnings of your passions through the medium of writing. It doesn’t have to be perfect nor should you ever self judge it by comparison to the work of others. God made us all and you are just as important and special to Him as any other person ever born on this temporal plane called earth. Just remember, we are here on a journey…it began at our birth…there is a path laid out & of course there are many who choose not to follow but nonetheless one day we come to the end of our sojourn here and crossover to our eternal journey. Yet as part of that core of truth that has been established in my soul, I have no doubt our choices & actions will determine our course on the other side.

After reading your writings, I felt a drawing, a calling, to response to that still small voice to reach out to you with these words that will hopefully encourage you on your journey in this life and also to encourage you to continue writing.

If you want a bit of insight on me, please feel free to read some of my works and yes feedback & critiques are always welcome. I am new to this site but have been writing for many moons. God bless you in the endeavors of your journey.

[k.m.b.]

Thank you so much for your very thoughtful feedback. I appreciate it so much and these words are exactly what i needed to hear. God bless.

[Wrenlane]

You're most welcome, just remember when the storms erupt in and around your life, "let not your heart be troubled". Like any loving parent His love encompasses you and every aspect of your life and heaven's angels stand in constant vigil around you. No one knows where your journey will take you in this life nor what might happen on the way, just don't loose site of the fact that it is a journey and like any journey there is a beginning, a middle ("the - dash") and a destination, but only you get to decide where that will be. Continued blessings K.B.M.

[Scott Thompson]

Why be like everyone else? Your plan is your own. "Normal" is boring, in fact I've spent the majority of my life trying NOT to be normal. You ask the same questions and feel the same confusion as everyone, they just can't be honest enough to even admit it to themselves. I saw a lot of my thoughts in this as well. Love it!

[k.m.b.]

Thank you so much for the feedback!