Vessle Part2

Part two of vessle i hope you like it. If you want to see part1 of vessle then go to my writing

You did the voice came again."Who said that louis said" looking around for a wepon. Look in the mirror the voice said daringly. Louis turned to the mirror where he saw him self. Everything was the same but his face, it was not Louis's face. Louis's blue eyes where replaced by dark red eyes and his short hair was replaced by long dirty hair. Louis moved back from the mirror, Louis felt his head to see that his hair was still short.Who are you louis asked moving back slowly from the mirror in til he hit the foot of his bed where carrel's lifeless leg layed.

 

"No the real question is who are you the voice said" when you find that out you will know who i'am. "Did you do this to my wife louis asked" the voice. No! the voice yelled we did this. You think that is your wife the voice came back clam and slow, then take a look at her face using my eyes. Louis then felt a sharp pain in his head throwing him to the floor. When the pain was over Louis soon made his way back to his feet but his eye sight was blurry. In Louis head he can hear the whispers of people sounding as if they where praying.

 

Louis eye sight begain to clear up as he looked around, Louis felt around his eyes and found blood, his eyes felt as if they where burn into his head. Do you see it the voice came do you see the real world. It looks the same louis said wiping the blood off his hands onto his shirt. No but it's not the voice said look at your so called wife. Louis turned to carrel and his heart skipped a beat. Carrel? Louis asked looking at his dead wife. Carrel hair was dark her eyes light yellow and her ears had small horns popping up out of them. Oh my god louis said running out the room into the living room. You can't run from this the voice came welcome to the real world. Honey? A voice came from the bedroom. Carrel? Louis asked while heading back towards the bedroom. "So the demon is still alive the voice said" coming from louis's head. Louis entered into the bedroom but when he looked at the bed carrel was not there all that was left was the nails covered in blood. Carrel!!? Louis called out are you.......... "Yes i'm here honey carrel said back". "Come to me Louis Carrel said". The door closed behind Louis, Louis turned and tried to open the door back up but could not. Where are you Carrel? Louis called out looking around. "Well look up Carrel said" to Louis, Louis looked up to see carrel hanging on to the light above the bed. Carrel swong down off the light and put her nails inside of louis's chest, Louis then let out a shocking yell.................................................

 

 

Author's Note

Tell me what i need to change plz

Reviews

[Elizabeth Thief]

Wow its an intense thriller. Maybe work on grammar but other than that its wonderful!

[scorpion-red]

i enjoyed this clenching piece but respectfully request you re-read and fix some of the grammar problems for instance the " should come after they finish talking and before the he/she said

i hope this helps
-J@3Y-