Harsh Love

written for a contest

Sorry, so sorry,  I'll never live your dreams.
Sorry, so sorry,  I rarely make you proud.
Sorry, so sorry,  I ignore your angry rants.
Sorry, truly sorry, but my own dreams scream too loud.

Tired, so tired of reprising how you scathed.
Tired, so tired of adopting your excuse.
Tired, so tired of learning crooked truths.
Tired, so damn tired of finding kindness in abuse.

Love you though, still love you. Our fights became a dance.
Love you, always loved you. But now I do by choice.
Love you as you love me, despite your scarring words.
Love, your harsh love, taught me my own, strong voice.

Author's Note

Phew, a poem about ambivalent love I guess ;-)

Don't be shy, tell me what you think!

Reviews

[Anindita Janhabee]

Quite emotional... Regretting is a part of the life though... Love is always painful no matter how you enjoy it... Like life is always beautiful, no matter how you live it... If this is your imagination, then it is great... Without being shy, I really appreciate the repetition of words... Such poems need rhymes or repetition to be perfect... I have recently written poems like this so I loved your thoughts...
But of course you can make it better by adding some more situations apart from - sorry, tired and love... for example, thanks, promise etc... well it's only a suggestion...
to be honest, your single poem fills innumerable emotions... keep it up!!!
Anindita : )

[Kaliope]

Thank you very much for stopping by and for your thoughtful suggestions. The poem was written for a contest though, and one of the requirements was twelve lines or less. Besides, to me it feels complete and since I'm not a poet by any stretch, my gut feeling is all I have to go by. Nevertheless, rest assured that I appreciate your comment and that I'm glad you enjoyed my excursion into poetry, despite its shortcomings :-)

[Anindita Janhabee]

It was my pleasure reading...

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

At the start this poem got me thinking about a dad, who wants his son to live out the dads dreams, instead of his own.
Then as I got further into the story I realised it probably was about a girl and a different kind of harsh love.
Either way the title really matched the poem to a T. It really was really harsh love.
I loved the story line, and I love how you repeated the words In every new paragraph, made it sound more poetic. Also loved the rhyming to, that also made it sound more poetic and really brang the piece together.
I have read some poems that sound more like stories this is a poem that definitely sounds like a poem.
I loved it, so meaningful, moving, emotion filled, deep, and kinda sad.
Really enjoyed this piece.
Keep writing :)

[Kaliope]

Thank you so much! I think this kind of love can occur in various kinds of relationships. Although I had something specific in mind when I wrote it, I really like how different readers have different interpretations. I'll be honest, I'm not much of a poet, so this was more a lucky strike than actual skill, but I'm really glad so many people seem to enjoy it :-D

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

I really did enjoy it. Your very much welcome :)

[Aura Devour]

This is so repayable at the moment for me. It hurts, all the neglect and harsh words and cruel intentions but you still love the person desperately. Beautiful. I love the use of the repetitive words.

[Kaliope]

Thank you very much :-)

[J Todd Underhill]

I like this piece and I am glad I stopped in. I hope more such poetry is being written by you. I host a poetry open mic over the internet and would be honored if you called a shared www.worldpoetryopenmic.net Friday nights 8pm Mountain time.

[Kaliope]

Wow, thank you for the invitation. I feel honored!

[TrishArias]

I really liked it. The repetitive phrases and words really get you into it.

[SuspectGray]

I would say more mercurial than ambivalent. Your up, your down, your into it, you hate it, you desire it, you wish it would end. More realistic perhaps than a one sided view of love.

[B]

Sometimes someone can do this without talking
imagine being ignored for a year
or someone refusing to show up anywhere near

i dunno sometimes i think
maybe bad words were better
but then again they both hurt

but somehow i still love
sucks
you must be a very kind person

[Kaliope]

Neglect is probably even worse but in case there are some relationships we can't chose, they simply are. I don't consider myself kind, I just went through a lot of phases - sadness, self-accusation, anger, hate even - but in the end I reached a state of acceptance, I guess. Took time though.

Thank you very much for reading and sharing your thoughts, I appreciate it!

[armin]

''despite your scarring words
love you as you love love me''

i liked the way the poem is written.

Enjoyed my read.

armin. ...

[Kaliope]

Thank you very much :-)

[Devons]

Ostensibly a winning, simple and unpretentious, song-like concept is made profound by meaning in this poem. The balance between the repeated hook-words of each verse and what is being conveyed creates a fine juxtaposition which drives home the sense of understanding and reality in a relationship. And there is no straight forward black and white about this, the conclusive message is one of maturity and wisdom in humanity. It isn't as easy as to think the ingredients of this relationship are incompatible to love, as might be basically and dismissively assumed - because in reality people do not think and react in such a clear-cut way. Despite all the flaws and shortcomings, real feelings are more grown-up. It isn't wine, roses and plaintive violins that constitute love - it is all things, pretty and ugly, rough and smooth. And there is irony to be found in it - as is found in the true reality of life in general.
An intelligent, real and well-crafted piece.

[Kaliope]

Wow, thank you so much for this wonderful review. I don't consider myself much of a poet, more a storyteller, but if I managed to convey this message I feel like I've done my job. So thank you again for taking the time to read and review my work.

[Donald Meikle]

It's not easy knowing when to speak and when not to.
Great poem about life and love

[Kaliope]

Thank you very much!

[Tomoe Tellez]

Now this is why love is so confusing :D. As I saw this almost anyone can relate to it no matter what kind of relationship they're in. In my case in the beginning, the first lines reminded me of how I feel with my mother sometimes. The second reminded me of her relationship with her mother. And third reminds of how when we love someone we'll love them forever no matter what, but in the end we all have to love ourselves more. Great job!

[Kaliope]

Thank you very much! Actually the connection to family that you mentioned is very close to what I had in mind when I wrote this poem. After all that's a kind of love we can't escape, even if we'd try to :-)