Aquatic Walls

 

I drowned

In those aquatic walls -

Beneath those white blankets 

Across my face.

Loudly at first -

But then reality set in

And I found myself mistaken.

 

The way he reached back

And touched his hair,

The way she whimpered

And sometimes screamed

With all the viciousness

That comes with frustration.

 

In stitched up shoes

And the brown-eyed Condescension.

 

All of this I notice

And all of this I allow

To touch me.

 

All of this

Becomes my anchor

To the depths

Of those aquatic walls.

 

Reviews

[ALifeAquatic]

"I see poem after poem that is about some emotion, usually sadness, that is totally boring, simple, under-developed and cliche, yet everyone and their brother has commented saying what a fantastic writer the author is.
Who are all these stupid people and why are they on this site????"

After that you had a whole lot to live up to! I've found a few writers on this site, who pretend to utter these sentiments but in reality write the same drivel and teenage angst that everyone is so fond of posting!

Having said that, I love this poem, it flows and it has a brilliant dark edge to it, I'm not the best when it comes to reviews, but with this poem you take something mundane and turn it on its head! What I read was voyeuristic, which is what I like about it, you don't delve into the feelings that the two share, but instead show, "sex," in the carnal reality! Of course I could be wrong maybe it isn't about, "sex!"

But just to finish and conclude I read this hoping that you wouldn't disappoint and you didn't! Really crappy review but sure!

AHouseOfChambers