the only picture I can paint is a canvas half empty

sometimes I think of you when I'm entwined in the vines that grow in my head,

when they spill from the garden in which they were sown

and strangle me with the memories of you that have rooted so deeply.

over time I've come to find that a potted plant is easy to crack when it's made of paper,

with no shell to hold back the overgrowth

it will flood.

and if somebody asks me again why I keep living under a rain cloud 

I'll tell them it's because I think drowning is fun,

that when I'm under the water looking up at the surface 

I find solace in seeing the distortion of the world 

and you, 

a mirage that seems so clear in these visions of mine, 

so detailed that the lines are brush strokes depicting 

the veins of a heart torn in two,

an anatomy of what happens when people break themselves in half for someone

who is already whole.

and I'll tell you,

I'm tired of bleeding out imagery and metaphors 

and writing poems nobody will ever read,

just trying to find some comfort in knowing that I am the only one 

whose mind breaks like a sentence unfinished,

where I'm reading the last few lines over and over again looking for the meaning of the whole thing.

and I wish I'd have set myself on fire

because at least the destruction of the pages wouldn't let me be reminded of an open ending

where there are fifty pages left 

and all I have is a pen without ink.

Author's Note

I'm looking for your thoughts on this piece! I wrote it as if it were spoken, which is why it's a bit longer than normal (I also used to write longer pieces like this when I started writing poetry). Tell me what you liked about it, what you didn't, I'm all ears. Though keep in mind this is the first piece I've finished in a while, I've been in quite a writer's block recently.

Reviews

[John the Baptist]

Too many relationships poems sound alike, with the repetitious you done me wrong, blah, blah, blah spanning the work from first to last, This one is different, showing an excellent use of imagery to illustrate frustration. The poem actually moves beyond relationship pain to a consideration of the meaning of life. Very well done.

[Karmee]

I'm tired of bleeding out imagery and metaphors
and writing poems nobody will ever read,

I really love this part, so much truth in this, I like this a lot. so much emotions. It's intriguing

[arcandon]

I really greatly enjoyed this poem it was very honest and very human about real feelings