Chapter 1 - All In My Head

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The houses that surrounded me looked as if they had been rotting for the past 100 years and have caught fire a time or two. The stale, sulfur rich air was just lingering, hardly any movement at all. It was hard enough to breathe standing still, let alone at a full sprint. I’m not even sure what I was running from at the time, it was like a giant smoke screen as black as night and sounded as if a thousand men were running behind me. I wish I knew more about it, but I always chickened out before getting close. Running through the dilapidated neighborhood, no other living thing was anywhere in sight. Never was and doesn’t seem like there ever will be. I would have even settled for a dog or cat, at least then I would know I wasn’t alone.

None of it made any sense. I run for what seems to be miles down random streets, through small convenient stores, anything to try and lose that cloud. I would always end up here, no matter what path I ran. Standing in the middle of a field surrounded by grass so tall it came above my waist, with nothing but small two story wooden house in the center. All the windows were broken and no light could be seen shining from within. The chimney on the right side of the house was falling to pieces, but it was the only thing that showed signs of life other than the cloud that was chasing me. Black smoke would sometimes slip through the cracks giving me hope someone was in there. 

Every time I attempt to get a closer look at the house, things start to become more unusual. The sky becomes more dark; the sound of the cloud becomes louder and my vision starts to fade. I can only get about 50 yards from the front porch before it happens. I wake up.

My eyes opened and I sat up so fast I almost gave myself whiplash. I wasn’t sure why the dreams even worried me anymore. It’s almost every night now, the same dream. “Damn it.” I must have been out of it. Class starts in ten minutes and I’m fifteen minutes away. Even though I was drenched in sweat, there was no time for a shower. After rummaging through wrinkled cloths on my floor, I threw on the first shirt I came across that could pass as clean. It was just an old orange shirt with Hammond University written across the front. Not the most attractive thing I owned but it would have to do. After throwing on some jeans and dousing myself in body spray, I bolted out of my bedroom.

“You’re going to be late again!” My uncle Louis yelled from his recliner he calls his throne. “Get kicked out of school and you get kicked out this house!” Without responding I ran out the house and slammed the door behind me. He isn’t a bad guy, most of the time. He took me in when I needed help and he doesn’t charge me rent, so I try not to complain. I just wish he would put down the bottle. 

As usual, it was hot and muggy outside. The joys of living in the south. It’s either hot as hell or cold as ice. My ’94 Mercury Sable looked more rough by the day. Only took about five attempts before the engine finally turned over. Being a broke college student, I never spent the extra money to work on the car. If it was running, that was good enough for me. I wish I would’ve spent money on getting the A/C fixed though. 

Driving to school was torture. I was already soaked in sweat, now it looks like a took a morning dip without drying off. Traffic wasn’t horrible so I got there quick. Parking is another story on its own. As usual, I parked in the field next to the highway. For such an expensive school, you’d think they would invest in a new parking lot.

My first class, History. I figured it would be a simple enough class to take as an elective for an easy A. After running for almost five minutes and up a flight of stairs to the classroom door I could hear the instructor inside giving her lecture. I slowly opened the door to try and enter as quietly as possible. The door wasn’t having any of that. It squeaked as though I was squeezing the life out of a rat. Naturally, all the students, even Mrs. Jefferson, stopped what they were doing and stared a whole straight through me. 

I just ignored them and walked over to the last empty seat at the back of the room. To the right of me, Aaron sat playing games on his phone. He was only here because his parents are making him continue his education. We have never hung out outside of school, but here we tend to stay close. We’re both outcasts, so we try to keep each other company.

“The hell dude? You sleep in a ditch or something?” Aaron whispered. “I’ll fill you in later, not in the mood.” I snapped back. He slumped back down into his seat. I usually don’t talk to anyone like that, but it’s just one of those days. I couldn’t pay attention to the lecture. I was too busy trying to figure out the dream. Why was I having it so often? What does it mean?

Before I knew it, History class was over. Probably because I missed half of it. When we were given the okay to leave, I headed straight to the gym locker room. I never played any sports, but I figured a quick shower would be nice. Standing in the last stall with my head against the wall, I could hear a few of the other students talking about their plans for the weekend. Going to the mall, day trips out of town or a small party. Everything I tend to avoid. It’s not that I don’t have any friends, I have just always been socially awkward. 

“Mr. Degray?” I peeked out from behind the shower curtain and saw the dean, Mr. Sturn, standing at the doorway to the locker room. 

“Yes sir?” 

“I was wondering if you’d have a minute to stop by my office before lunch?”

“Of course, I can be there in about 45 minutes if that’s okay.”

“Sounds good. See you then.”

            He turned around and walked out with that unusual crooked smile he always had on his face. Mr. Sturn was a difficult man to read. He normally stayed in his office and very rarely went out of his way to speak with anyone. He was a sharp dresser though; I’ll give him that. Suit and tie, no matter the occasion. 

            The locker room was starting to get crowded since the baseball team finished up their morning practice. They’re not typical jocks that made fun of nerds like, but I wasn’t sticking around to give them a reason to. I threw my old clothes back on, hoping the body spray would overpower the scent from this morning. Finally cleaned up, I headed out.

 

Author's Note

Please do ignore the fact there is a lack of detail and mistakes in the use of past tense. This is just a rough draft I am looking to get opinions on to make sure everything flows correctly. Formatting was also an issue importing from Word.

Reviews

[Joshua Pleming]

I can kind of see where you're going with the story and it seems like you know what you want to convey. I would start by working through your dream sequence a little more. Try to approach it with the mindset that you don't already know what's going to happen as you're writing. I find that reading over my work like I'm a reader picking it up for the first time helps me figure out which details need to be further expanded in order to fully convey your description. You have a lot going on in just a few paragraphs. I would try to flesh them out a little, and find a steady pace. You don't want to overwhelm the reader. I always go with the old adage "Show, not tell." But it's looking interesting. Curious to see where the story is going!

[Sylenn]

Thanks for the tips! I completely agree with you. I'm the type of writer that jots down as much as I can and moves on to the next chapter. After I finish the book or get to a stopping point, I go back and fine tune everything. I will definitely add more detail so it's not all crammed together.

Thanks again!

[Krystal]

I think it was a really good start so far!! I don't exactly know how I truly feel about it just yet, but I'm very interested to see where you will be going with it!

[Sylenn]

Thank you! I'll be posting Chapter 2 soon!