We're Together

A song (NOT A POEM). I truly want any constructive critiszm I can get. Typically, I post poems but my muse wanted a song.

Staring out of the window 
another place that I remember
Wind and waves on a summer day 
a crowd on the street, but we were together

 

No, I didn't sleep that night 
Yeah, the moon, it blinded me
I don't want to let you go
No, I just don't think so
I don't think so

 

I know I will sleep tonight
Yeah, gonna let you hold me
Gonna step out of this crowd
Go back to you and me 

 

Looking out our window
the crowds have gone in, and still we stay together

 

No, I didn't sleep that night 
Yeah, the moon, it blinded me
 I don't want to let you go
No, I just don't think so
I don't think so

 

I know I will sleep tonight
Yeah, gonna let you hold me
Gonna step out of this crowd
Go back to you and me 

Reviews

[Healing Star]

Wind and Waves on a summer day
A wonderful thing when you are together
I know you will sleep tonight, with your dreams of him
to hold you tight, you wisp me through the memories
of where we've been of what we've seen.
You see the Heart on a summers air,
is out floating in the dark.
We're out floating in the dark, on pillows of memories gone by.
Can you hear it in the wind, and in the wave come crashing in
The softness of your silky hair, it is in your eyes this night so fair
And then the smoothness of your skin, it touches me and my mind goes in a spin
Me thinks we will be forever here, but then I realize my fate
I am here and you are there, I can only know you in my dreams
But dreams are sweet when they are there, the dreams of one so soft and fair.

[Rusty]

Sing It!

[Tasha]

This is a beautiful song, I would love to hear it.

[Pax Analog]

Do you sing & play? Love to hear this song. Sweet, simple, essence of the amorous heart.

[Matt "Mickey" Denney]

I truly like this writing! I really can see some great acoustic guitar music set to it. It definitely draws me in :) Nice write!

[An owl on the moon]

There is both joy and pain here, but a lifting vision of what will be... love fiercely lived and given... A wondrous song to be sure, and so hope filled in days when love is too often cast aside... I heartily agree.. would love to hear this put to music!

[Distant horizons]

Go back to you and me....very nicely worded.

[Alex Vidmar]

I like this very much. Would love to hear the song :P