Demons

A short reflection upon dealing with the things that cause pain.

Demons

 

Sentimental observations demand control over my modern contemplations, revealing to me the cold hold my past has on my present; and my demons hold onto to me fiercely, as fiercely as I have held onto them.  To disconnect from them now would be to disconnect from my past, causing a chemical-burn like reaction, tearing my feet from my ground, till I am floating as a sphere in the atmospheric void called nothingness--or identity crisis. I am my experience and my experience has been demonic. I can’t truly deny it, or feign its inexistence, because that would be an affront to integrity and a claim to ingenuity. It is demonic itself, looking at my demons and denying their existence. 

 

I rarely force the issue, I rarely tempt my demons with challenges and feuds--but oh do they love to play. When I am in the mood, they love to play a game where they swarm my mind with 2 truths and lie and have me guess which is the lie. I can never tell, and they don’t tell me either, so I suppose they win. They also like to play soldiers, where they pretend like they are going to hurt me, usually by shooting me in the head. They never actually do though. I don’t feel like playing with them today. Sometimes I feel like their games are unfair and manipulative. Or am I the manipulative one? I suppose this is still part of the game; but I digress.

 

It is true; mind games are dangerous to my health--force-feeding me darkness in disguise as light. And the light my demons bring me is never quite honest. There is always something quite frankly fucked about demonic light, because it is always abusive, always intrusive and never conductive to health and/or goodness; but I digress once more.

 

I recognize the demons beneath, I do not deny them, and I hope to one-day live life without them. But Cowardice tempts me and Fear resents me, and Father Anxiety loves to direct me. These three demons threaten my safety, and their children are also my indirect enemies. I am getting better though, and the only way out is to face them head on, to push them all out. So that’s what I’m doing, I’m confronting my past, to find the place where they were conceived at. Then I will become a demon to them; haunt them from inside, force them to commit suicide.

Author's Note

Any comments/thoughts?

Thank you!

Reviews

[Stefano Segnan]

Greetings! First, methinks it was an easy read and quite interesting, which is usually a winning combination. Second, while I really enjoyed the style of your writing, the second paragraph seems watered down in comparison with the others. It looks as it was written in a different time than the rest, or by a different pen. Thirdly, the style of the other three paragraphs are entertaining and wonderful, so overall, a really good piece. Keep going!

[Justin Mitchell]

Thank you for the review Stefano, it's very helpful. I wrote the middle paragraph at the same time as the rest, but I see how it is a little different. What seems watered down? The stuff about mind-games? The language used? Thanks again, I very much appreciate your review.

[Stefano Segnan]

The style feels different, the language looks less sophisticated compared to the other parts; and while you employ longer sentences, by the end of the second paragraph they are short and simpler in language than the rest which gives the feeling of being "watered down".

[mikael owusu]

Man that is a brilliant piece....i absolutely love it! bravo.

[Justin Mitchell]

Thank you very much!