Heavy eyes and uneasy hearts

A Story by julius9609

It's pretty rough hearing your friends put you down when you feel like you're in love. After I saw the supposed love of my life in the car with my best friend holding hands I called abel. As always he brought me a pack of cigarettes and a few pills to hold me off till the next morning, he knew I couldn't sleep. He also knew I was forcing myself into addiction because I thought it would make her like me more. We sat on my back porch just talking till 2 a.m., I had explained the situation and he simply laughed. I understood why he laughed because he didn't feel what I was feeling but in a weird way it cheered me up. After he left it was about 4 a.m. I was wired as always. I just sent a big regretful text to Angelica, I can honestly say I wasn't expecting her to be awake but she sent back saying "I need to call you" which brought the biggest smile on my face. In my head I pictured this, "oh hey Julius it was a misunderstanding about me holding hands with shayne, he kind of went for it so I went along" I know it's a ridiculous idea but s**t when you feel like I did any thought like that brings a smile to your face. Well the phone rings I took Time to answer trying not to sound desperate, I got chills when I said hello, the kind where you feel a ball in your throat and you know your going to cry, but at the same time you feel cold even when it's hot.
Angelica: " hey Julius..... Ummm... I know you saw me an shayne in the car.".

Me: "Yeah I did, but I mean it's cool you know?".

Angelica: "No it's not, Julius I've been wanting to tell you..."

And playing dumb I said "what?"

Angelica: "I don't want to talk to you anymore, I don't love you I don't think I ever will. We're better off just being friends."

Me:"just delete my number."

I hung up, I had never cried so much over something like that I remember staring in the mirror simply judging myself saying why can't I be better why can't I just have you. But of course the mirror wouldn't have any answers. I remember crying into my pillow just shivering thinking I love you so much but you can't see that. As if God was listening she texted me, saying "I cried all night too".

By: Julius contreras

This is based on my real life