Piano Pieces

The thunderstorm arrived in more ways than one. Dad came home at midnight as lightning lit the sky and flashed through the windows. The usual banging and crashing, cursing and singing proceeded as thunder tried to rival his volume.

“Diane! Diane!” his voice slurred, shouting for me. He forgot my name often, or never really knew it. Either way I locked my door.

“Ah F**k! Diane!” he screamed. “W***e.”

He continued to throw and smash whatever he got his hands on or his foot into, muttering to himself. I listened, shivering, and I prayed he wouldn’t be able to make it up the stairs.

Then I heard it. The cacophony of glass shattering, wood splintering, chalky notes screaming in protest.

“No. No, no, no!” I unlocked the door and scrambled down the stairs.

My father was leaning against one of the walls. His eyes bloodshot and cheek red as the devil he was. He glowered at me. “Where the hell were you?”

Theo’s piano, my piano, it stood proudly with a gaping hole in its side the size of a kitchen sink.

“What did you do?!” I shouted at him.

“Help your father upstairs,” he ignored me.

I stared at him speechless. It was beyond me trying to fathom who stood in front of me, my father or an intruder. In fact I’m sure I came to the conclusion he was both.

“The f**k you standing there for?” He looked behind him at the piano, “This? The f**k is it?”

“It’s my piano,” I said, voice faltering.

He took a picture frame off the wall and smashed it against the piano, stumbling towards it.

“Stop it!” I screamed as thunder crashed outside.

“Stop?” he taunted. A wicked smile crossed his face next thing he did was kick through the face of it with his steel toe boot. “Steal this? F*****g criminal in my house.”

He went to lean against the piano and missed, falling to the floor.

“I didn’t steal it! It’s my piano!” I cried out. While he was attempting to get up I scrambled for a splintered piece of the picture frame, wielding it above my head.

He sneered at me from the ground as he grabbed the bench to hoist himself up. His grip slipped so he stared up at me with his glazed eyes. “Put that down. You look like a fool.”

My jaw clenched as anger coursed through me. “Get out.”

“What?”  

“Get out!” I screamed.

“F**k off!”

I cracked the frame over his back, going to kick him. “Get out! Get out! Get out!”

He grabbed my foot and pulled it out from under me. “F*****g b***h.”

As I crashed to the floor I got to my knees and began to beat him with my fists. Everything was red. His nose started bleeding after I landed a hit to it. All the while we were shouting and screaming at each other. He was snarling vile words at me as he tried to grab my fists. Struggled as I did, he still got a hold of them putting an end to me beating on him. With his rough hold on my wrists he threw me to the floor. I screamed as he began to rain blows on me.

“Stop!” I shouted, my voice raw and desperate. I cried out over and over, my voice growing smaller with each hit as sobs racked my chest. The stinging pain from every blow spreading throughout my body.

Finally he stopped and stood shoving me with his foot. I flinched away curling up in a ball. He went to the refrigerator and grabbed another beer. He took two steps, a few sips and fell to the floor. He blacked out, the glass bottle shattered against the tile. Slowly I stood to access the damage, my entire body trembling.

Keys were scattered across the floor, three holes had been blasted into my piano, Theo’s piano. It looked irreparable. I felt like that piano, irreparable. How much more of him would just slip through my fingers?  It was swept away so easily. No control of this mass destruction of the boy without a winter jacket. This wasn’t going to be my father’s victory.

I wiped away my tears and went to the sleeping dog on the floor. I searched his pockets and found nothing but bar tabs. I couldn’t say I was disappointed. His foot hung limply in my hand as I began to drag him out of the kitchen and out the door. My breath hiccuped as tears threatened to fall again. Not this time. I dragged him through the door and out into the yard and the rain.

“Wake up,” I nudged him with my foot. No response. “Get up!” I screamed as lightning illuminated the sky and thunder shook the ground. My foot barreled into his side. He didn’t move beyond the force of my kick, he even had the nerve to begin snoring. “I’m not done you b*****d! Wake up!”

Wind whipped my hair as rain poured down. My screams fell on deaf ears, but I kept going, the thunder cheering me along. “You ruin everything!” Rain was soaking into my clothes, my hair, my skin. The wet tendrils clung to my face as I fell to my knees. “What happened?! What happened to you?! Who even are you?!” I grabbed the sides of his jacket and shook him. “My name is Dana! Do you know me? I’m your daughter, Dana!” I screamed. While the cold wet ground stung the skin of my knees, tears stung my cheeks. I went to hit him one last time but my body gave out. I sat by him in the freezing air. “You f*****g b*****d.”

The rage puttered out and finally I stood up. Time to return to the house. I made sure to lock the door before going to the battered body of my piano. Keys lay like war casualties on the floor. I swept a few keys towards it. I’d have to clean it in the morning, haul it outside, like everything else my father ruined.

I fell asleep watching the board against my broken window and waiting for pebbles to call me away.