love

it is said that nothing is right or wrong in love. at teenage, this is not exactly the same..any turn may go wrong..at this stage, what we feel like, is my motive, to show here.

Feeling of love,
is it wrong to love?
its a feeling that can bring,
paradise on earth;
but we have to hide,
is loving you a crime?
"No cuz we have to be good,
in our parent's eye."
Arent we mature?
I m 18, and you even more.
they think we are just kids,
and cant decide,
how to feel on our own?
"No, they think our good,
and dont want things to get puzzled,
but at this point,
they will misunderstand our love.
If you can wait,
for the right time , my dear.
I will get a degree, a decent job,
then i will propose you,
in front of all."
if they reject our love?
"No, they wont cuz they will know,
you are my princess, and believe me dear,
we will always be together. "

Author's Note

hey, its not a love poem..i want to ask something. you can say poem was a picture of the story going. i know you have lots of questions why i wrote this, or maybe what i was thinking. good..i m confused too. the poem i wrote, its common thought, but is it correct to hide? parents will not agree for this...and thats why we hide. what u think..is it the right choice?
answer in reviews. both positive and negative views are welcomed. :)

Reviews

[Ena Lona Kendra]

Below are a few editions I made on misspelled words
In the most part I loved it

Feeling of love,
is it wrong to love?
its a feeling that can bring,
paradise on earth;
but we have to hide,
is loving you a crime?
"No cuz we have to be good,
in our parent's eye."
Aren't we mature?
(I'm)I m 18, and you even more.
they think we are just kids,
and cant decide,
how to feel on our own?
"No, they think our(we're) good,
and don't want things to get puzzled,
but at this point,
they will misunderstand our love.
If you can wait,
for the right time , my dear.
I will get a degree, a decent job,
then I will propose you,
in front of all."
if they reject our love?
"No, they wont cuz they will know,
you are my princess, and believe me dear,
we will always be together. "

[ayesha gupta]

thanks . i will correct it. anyways, that was your view on poem, have you read "aurthor's note" , i asked a question. i hope you dont mind thinking about it a minute and texting a comment. :)

[ayesha gupta]

hey, btw "our good" means what is good for us. arent those words conveying the meaning?

[ayesha gupta]

hey, btw "our good" means what is good for us. arent those words conveying the meaning?

[Ena Lona Kendra]

Do as you please. Don't let your parents get in the way.they don't know what your feelings are and they can't know unless they are you. And they can't. So yes I think its right

[Basu Gupta]

I like it..though not a poem according to you.. but still it involves a very important question which I personally not given so much light.
I can't comment anything sophisticatedly on such coz, in my opinion it depends on parents to parents.
Some families have a friendly atmosphere irrespective of age n' gender of the members while some have sophisticated members.
So if the person is quite casual with his parents he should share and take their advices about handling their relationship in a matured way.
Nice piece by the way and keep it up girl..

[ayesha gupta]

if it had been friendly atmosphere with parents, there was no point of question.
and even if they understand, they will say "your failure in life, carrier(which is not 100% impossible) is due to distraction called love"
my only fear.
i dont want that comments because all my failure would be because of me, not him.
thanks for review ,basu.

[Basu Gupta]

I agree ..a person's failure is just because of his insufficient will power n' determination.
One's lover isn't responsible.
Btw Your Welcome

[stars are far]

you know , im one of the people who hide their love relationships, becaus ei know that my parents will never agree, but after ive been heartbroken i knew why tey say no , to protect us, but still i do believe that we have to fall in love in order to know many things in life, like how to feel, and how to be yourself, how to make things work by your self, against the world, you might find him a lover, but he is actually one of the world...not a part of you, and always be cautios, they might betray you.. and as our proffesor told us, 99% of the guys are wolfs and the 1% bites, so yeah .. just always be alerted ,and you are free to love.. with the good luck from me darling

[ayesha gupta]

thanks for your advice and review. 1year 10months already passed hiding. and he is not that new that i cant see his wolfy nature. lol.
he is more like a best friend. ..a motivator and making me do study. lol.
i m sure your answer to my question would be different after reading it.
and my mom knows him as my friend (but not as lover).
so, thats how it becomes simple yet complicated.
thanks for review.

[stars are far]

well, yeah I thought its newrelationship, if its been long time, yeah its more likely you know each other, and yeah it will be safe even if he is just a friend in your mothers eyes, at least she knows him :D

[ayesha gupta]

yep. :) thanks.

[M.A.Rathore]

Hi Ayesha
Love is a love .When someone loves somebody. He does not feel any var against it. Still our society does npt accept love as a respective action. Originally the whole world centre round on the issue of love as a weak passion and permanent attraction of two different sexes. Everyone should avoid it as possibly as it can be. If you are still immature then it is advisible not to step against your parents. Afyer years or two you shall nurture the feelings of love .Till then love the person you are loving as purely as you can but beware that it should not exceed the mark.
As for as your poetry is concerned it is superbly written besides some common errors do happen at this tender age.
Have a lovely journey.
Keep writing...

[ayesha gupta]

thanks a lot for advice and review.

[M.A.Rathore]

Most welcome always....

[Pushkar Prabhat]

if it is true love, if, there is no hiding it!
But, like any other thing time and place matters............so one should wait for that.
i hide!
liked the poem......though thought it could need some work with the flow!
all the best!!
:)
waise kehte hai ki ishq aur mushq( cold, i think) chupaaye nhi chupta......!!!

[ayesha gupta]

thanks for review

[Pushkar Prabhat]

you are welcome.............:) :)

[Sindu]

Nicely written Ayesha! You explained the angst really well.
A touchy topic! Honestly, I guess the peerspective changes with person and situations. For a guy or a girl; parents, majorily, will consider them to be kids and a new entity who they are not aware of will register as a threat. In my opinion, it is not good to hide if that girl or boy is really sure about their connection being true and as a responsible person should tell to there family about it when the time is right. Rather than act rash.
Also at the same time many confuse many other emotions for love...

[ayesha gupta]

thanks for review