The story I never wanted to tell

Don't worry.
  Nothing twisted.

I saw your blue toes.
  The image sticks in my mind.

You never treated me as a child,
  and I think you saw me as a friend.

You and your wife liked having me around,
  and now I realize.

I was a bit of stability.

When you went under,
  helping two others live,
     I was playing.

In the hospital,
  I saw you.

I knew.

I was told I had to look after my friend.

I did.

I still can't get  the image out of my head.

Seeing your blue toes.