Heart strings

Life pulls you by the heart strings, keep overcoming the obstacles.

It was Monday

I had class in the Fine Arts Building at my University

I hate when I go into the Fine Arts and my body urges me to dance

I thought of the dance clothes I was in

I thought of the dance auditions

I transferred three times

It was such a pain in the a*s, transferring

Trying to figure out what I want to do with my life

I felt like writing is the one of the ways I can express myself other than drawing and dancing

It took me back to freshman year when I was a dance major

God, I miss dancing

You have no idea

Every time I go in the Fine Arts Building, my heartstrings tug a little

I would love to do dance improv

Just turn on some music

Nicolas Jaar, my love

And dance

Let the feelings and emotions pour in my whole body

Listen to the music

Spontaneously dance to it

That's sort of what I want to do after I graduate

Do some Psychology, travel around, write poetry and dance

To find a way to incorporate it all

Every day when I think about class

I think about how badly I want to graduate and do things I love

Every day. 

It's such a long journey

Back when I was in London

I listened to Nicolas Jaar

Especially, "Into the Rain Again, Mi Mujer, Colomb, Fall '08"

Some songs are 45 minutes long

I turn up the volume

I'm hearing impaired

To fully hear the beat

Close my eyes

And think about life

What I want to do in life, how far I've gotten, how to overcome the damn obstacles

But

You see

Life is definitely a beautiful thing

You just have to stop and appreciate the beauty around you during the hard times

Every night

I mostly have trouble sleeping

Those damn thoughts come into my head and take control of my mind

Just inhale, exhale and take things as they come

It's hard

It's hard to feel motivated even when you want things badly

Like the motivation slowly dwindled away

To take things as they come

There's a saying, "Don't think too much, you'll create a problem that wasn't even there in the first place"

Couldn't be more true

People told me I think too much

One friend back in London told me she has never met anyone who thinks so much as I do 

I've had people tell me, "Oh, so you're a Psychology major? So you do think a lot?"

I didn't know how to answer that

Just train yourself to stop thinking incessantly

The mind loves to ramble on and on

It's a vicious cycle 

Often, I remind myself to take a deep breath, exhale and take things as they come

Whatever happens, happens.

Try not to plan so much into the future

Because in the end, things usually don't go according to plan

It's been like that for the past year and a half when I was back in London

Nothing went according to plan

It frustrated the hell out of me

Putting so much damn time and energy into making plans

And in the end, it just does not freaking work

My friend asked me why I didn't dance for a living

I told her it's tough

I love dancing as a hobby, but couldn't picture myself doing just dance as a career

I pictured myself rather combining dance with psychology and writing

That way, I do all those things I love

Just got to get back to dancing again

People told me not to ever stop dancing because I love it so much

It's like an escape from the world

And escape from the worry and stress

Move your body with the music and let your beautiful soul shine through

I know I would feel complete again

Like something is no longer missing from me

Just inhale, exhale and let the universe do its own thing

Things always, always have a way of working itself out

"When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it." - Paulo Coelho 

Author's Note

Feel free to write your own experiences that you overcame, would love to get some input!

Reviews

[KWP]

well i think this is really fabulous - an insight into the mind of another - and yes surely we can all align with those thoughts - it's a journey - yes - we all must walk it - it's just how we choose to walk ... or in the case dance - to our own unique show ... I really love this - I am wondering if it would be better as a short prose piece - I certainly think it would stand alone in that form - perhaps you could put in the the Dangerous Fiction as a piece of prose with a bit of formatting - see what people think - i did exactly that with my poem Grinning - I surprised myself at the outcome ...

this made me feel good - thanks for sharing chick ... x