To them it was not love For love was only a four letter word. No no, only a never ending utterance could possibly describe their magical synchronization In each of their eyes was the other's.
The evil twins; Time and Distance must have laughed for days at their future plans. Life swooped him off to strange lands and sadness found her an all too easy target
now she lays by the phone breathing as loudly as possible to distract her mind, messages have become so seldom their more like postcards, a 'merry Christmas Hun' is now a smile face, a wink is a happy birthday, did she selfishly keep all the love she wonders...
so in her grief she stands, watching times mocking hands. cold and alone, no one to hold loving herself on her own the first owner of a post office phone.
I certainly feel the isolation, the separation and the loneliness. And then the realisation that distance does not make the heart grow fonder. So sad.
A well crafted poem.
Two minor points:3rd Stanza ... their more like postcards...= they're more ...
4th verse... times mocking hands (love this phrase !)...= time's.
As a Brit and an old Brit as well ... I do not fully understand the significance of the very last line.... please enlighten me.
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
yea sure... i was making the point earlier that his text messages became so rare that they were more.. read moreyea sure... i was making the point earlier that his text messages became so rare that they were more like postcards, and thats why i said she owns a post office phone because it takes her quite some time to hear from him... so its like a liitle back in time when people had to wait quite to hear from their loved ones overseas reincarnated...
hope that makes a bit more sense
Clever poem. Very poignant and beautifully written, the sadness of long distance relationships that grow cold and make one suspicious of deceit...looking at the clock waiting for the darn phone to ring...been there done
This was very beautiful. If I may ask, is this about long distance relationships and how the boy's texts became nothing but icons?
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
yes it is. they were in love and ready for the world but long distance changed his attitude towards .. read moreyes it is. they were in love and ready for the world but long distance changed his attitude towards her.
thanks for reading
11 Years Ago
Ah, I thought so. I'm currently in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend who is living in .. read moreAh, I thought so. I'm currently in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend who is living in Germany right now, but we still care for one another. And you are very welcome.
I am but a simple young man who just likes serenity. all i ask is honesty towards my poems. I get a good feeling when i feel like structure words properly and paint my thoughts.. and that feeling is s.. more..