postcards from a cellphone

                          Postcards from a cellphone

To them it was not love
For love was only a four letter word.
No no, only a never ending utterance
could possibly describe their magical synchronization
In each of their eyes was the other's.

The evil twins; Time and Distance must have laughed
for days at their future plans.
Life swooped him off to strange lands
and sadness found her an all too easy target

now she lays by the phone
breathing as loudly as possible to distract her mind,
messages have become so seldom their more like postcards,
a 'merry Christmas Hun'  is now a smile face,
a wink is a happy birthday,
did she selfishly keep all the love she wonders...

so in her grief she stands,
watching times mocking hands.
cold and alone,
no one to hold
loving herself on her own
the first owner of a post office phone.

Reviews

[Richard Man]

I certainly feel the isolation, the separation and the loneliness. And then the realisation that distance does not make the heart grow fonder. So sad.
A well crafted poem.
Two minor points:3rd Stanza ... their more like postcards...= they're more ...
4th verse... times mocking hands (love this phrase !)...= time's.
As a Brit and an old Brit as well ... I do not fully understand the significance of the very last line.... please enlighten me.

[Samoda]

yea sure... i was making the point earlier that his text messages became so rare that they were more like postcards, and thats why i said she owns a post office phone because it takes her quite some time to hear from him... so its like a liitle back in time when people had to wait quite to hear from their loved ones overseas reincarnated...
hope that makes a bit more sense

[Richard Man]

Yeah thanks.

[Serenity Faith]

You're second stanza is the most powerful in this piece. You personified Time and Distance so well, I could picture a boy and girl, sending happy messages to one another,and in their times apart, smiling with all the love in thier heart, while above them, the whispy images of another man and woman laugh at their innocence...makes me want to punch them in the face in honesty, but still....I loved this. My favorite from you...I can see clearly the time change and the girl waiting by her phone, wishing for the love to be sent to her again. I can understand all to well. Looking forward to what you write next ^_^ you've won me as your fan.

[Samoda]

awww... thank you so very much, really appreciate it:)

[Serenity Faith]

Anytime ^_^

[eglantine]

I like "The evil twins; Time and Distance" it'd be fun to feature them more--what do they look like? Personify them. Thanks for sharing.

[Samoda]

thank you :)

[Debbie_Philly]

This is excellent.... Love the flow and the subject...
so in her grief she stands,
watching times mocking hands.
cold and alone,
no one to hold
loving herself on her own
the first owner of a post office phone.

Great piece !!

[Samoda]

thanks much:)

[Ada Slowe]

Great poem.

[Samoda]

thank u:)

[Ada Slowe]

welcome

[Deanna Maestas]

I liked this poem, it was interesting to read because the tone brings out much emotion.

[Samoda]

thank you

[Aerosol4Brains]

Awa girl this lovely :) It does seem like nowadays phones are more like postcards. Abbreviated words and quick thoughts, not very personal at all yet we hold onto them for proof that the other end still care about us. Awesome XD

[Samoda]

thank you :)

[Be myself!]

I like it. Well written. I can feel the emotions coming out of the poem. Good Job

[Samoda]

thank you

[Be myself!]

No problem.

[Carly]

Small grammar issue "messages have become so seldom their more like postcards," should be "there" instead.

Nice depiction of a long distance relationship being held together by text messages. Something many people can relate to these days.

[Samoda]

yah my grammar always struggles, thank you:)

[jesslynn]

I ejoyed this poem, I think many can relate to this poem in their own specific way.

[Samoda]

thank you:)

[for.all.we.know]

for some reason it reminds me of a sonnet ahah but i know its not
but i like this a lot like the line about the evil twins
truly beautifully written

[Samoda]

thanks a lot for reading :)