Chapter 1: faces of love.

What is Agape, really? Is it an emotion? An action? A supernatural aether?

What’s your favorite food and drink?

For me, Thai food holds a very special place in my heart, and nothing beats a cold glass of Thai tea to cool my curry-scorched tongue. When I talk about Thai food, my eyes get as big as the smile on my face �" and when I meet someone who hasn’t tried it, it’s my life’s mission to convince him how great it is.

“I absolutely love Thai food!” I say. “Love it love it love it �" I could talk for days about how great it is �" let’s start with Panang and work our way to Phad Thai…”

Sometime midway through that conversation, my friend realizes I wasn’t joking about talking about Thai food all day, and deftly changes the course of the conversation by remarking on how spicy food makes him sweat and generally lowers his quality of life:

“And speaking of which, how is your quality of life these days?”, he asks �" “How’s the wife?”

He’s a smart guy because he knows the only thing I love more than Thai food is my wife and God, and I tell him so.

“Isn’t it interesting how you tell me how much you love a delightful concoction of peanuts, coconut oil, and nearly toxic levels of curry �" and in the same breath you say how much you love your wife and even God?”

The distinction between our various forms of love is alarmingly vital to living a healthy, fulfilling, and most importantly, obedient life.

God is love, and there is no greater path than to pursue the love of God.

The sad fact is this. Many of us �" devoted, God-fearing Christians �" have lost the path. We’ve forgotten the true definition of agape, the reality of the Kingdom of God. Without a concrete spiritual reality, our lives are quickly eroded and like plants without water, our fruit shrivels away to naught.

Our divorce rate is just as high as anyone else’s. We’re involved only in our own lives without thinking twice about others, and we hop from church to church with the attention span and loyalty we’ve been taught by our economy �" our jobs and businesses.

But here’s the good news.

That can all change, and it will change �" and it begins with you.

Nothing we do, whether in ministry, relationships, or in obedience to the Father is ever truly effective without God’s perfect love.

And that’s the key difference. It’s God’s perfect love.

Natural vs Supernatural

One of the most marked characteristics of Agape is that we have no means of accessing it in the natural. It’s not an emotion, or any other kind of driving force that can be manufactured by man. The other forms of love are emotions that rise up within us, involuntarily and unbidden. Now, emotions are good, given by God and are thus extremely useful, but because they’re human feelings, they’re subject to error.

Perfect love however, is a life-changing product of the Spirit. I’m talking about supernatural power generated from God’s holiness; the passion to walk up to complete strangers to pray for healing, the trust in God’s faithfulness to see the healing manifested and the glory of Christ’s inheritance unveiled. Because when we’re walking in love; in the Spirit, that’s exactly what we do. We let down the veil of our pride and insecurity to reveal the awesome faithfulness and love of God.(Rom. 15:30, Col. 1:8, 2 Tim. 1:7, Gal. 5:22)

Agape is supernatural, and there’s only one place you can go to find it. There’s a time-tested, proven way to walk in the power of God’s perfect love, and we’ll get to that very soon, but first  �" what is agape really? If we were to observe agape, really see it with microscopic precision; if we were to strip away the irrational reverence and pretentious connotations attached to a highly attainable and easily accessible gift from the Spirit, what would we see? Yes, it’s a supernatural product of the Spirit, and yes it’s the most powerful thing a human can gain access to, but how does that apply to my life as a believer?

You’ve probably heard of the Greek words for love:

• Eros: Sensual love.
• Phileo: Brotherly love.
• Koinonea: “Fellowshipping” love
• Agape: God’s perfect love.
• Storge: General word for love.

This is where we get a more accurate definition of God’s perfect love �" the love Christ taught, spoke, practiced and walked in.

God’s perfect love is perfect love. Love that banishes all fear, conquers all things, never fails.

Love:

“is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails…

Agape is the foundation of all things that are of God, and is thus the core of our existence as sons and daughters of the living God. Without God’s love we’re nothing and with it we’re everything.”

A visualization of love based off of Paul’s teaching on the “greatest way” in 1 Corinthians 13.

Greek Words, Classic Historians and Equality

One of the problems with the word Agape is that it’s usually lumped together with the other forms of love, like I just did in the list above. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s the perception that’s often created as a result �" that God’s love stands side-by-side with, and is somehow equal to human love.

It’s like making a list of great books from classical history :

• “The Odyssey” by Homer
• “Memorabilia” by Xenophon
• “The Holy Word of God” by… God
• “The Epic of Gilgamesh” by an author unknown
• “The Aeneid” by Virgil
• “The Histories” by Herodotus

Again, nothing wrong with the format as long as equality of importance is not assumed by association. Yes, they’re all important books, but one stands head and shoulders above the rest. Books composed by man may be accurate, inspiring, beautiful, and true; but none of them can claim the authenticity and power of the Living God. What book has done more for mankind?

The gap between human love and God’s perfect Love is just as great.

This is why the word agape is used nearly 120 times in the New Testament, and the verb form of the word agapan is used over 130 times �" phileo in contrast, is used 54 times if you combine both noun and verb form (phileo, philos).

Christianity was and is built on the power of agape �" God’s love, not human emotion. The pagans during the early period of the church were amazed by the way the Christians loved each other, and it was this love that drew them to Christ. The success of God’s love in the early church is no different today. More have come to the Kingdom of God in through love than in any other way. It’s easy to get the idea that defending the gospel through debate will win people over to Christ, and while this may hold true in some cases, focussing on the whole with apologetics as the primary tool is a flawed method.

How many times have you changed your life philosophy because someone argued sense into your head?

When was the last time you walked away from a furious debate scratching your chin and nodding your head in wonder and full agreement with the brilliance of your opponents rhetoric?

If you’re searching for a time I’ll help you out. The answer, if you’re like every other red-blooded human on this planet, is “none �" when I think I’m right there’s no silver-tongued creature on God’s green earth who can convince me I’m wrong.”   It’s human nature. Knowledge puffs up, on both sides of the argument. No one wins if the prize is sharing the truth. But love builds up, again, on both sides of the conversation. One receives truth, the other gets the prize of sharing the truth �" win win. That’s how spreading the good news works.

Spreading the gospel can be as simple as sharing God’s Love. It’s interacting, speaking, teaching and developing relationships in God’s perfect love. Sharing God and sharing his perfect love are virtually one and the same, because God is love. (1 John 4:8)

Agape is the core of who God is, and the foundation of any act of obedience to him. I hope the word isn’t off-putting. “Obedience” has taken an ugly form over the ages. In our human world it’s associated with slavery, control freaks, bondage, and oppression. But God is love. His commands are for our greatest good, like a loving parent…

…but in a perfect sort of way. Take his names for example, the characteristics of our God:

• Jehovah Jireh: God our provider.
• Jehovah Nissi: God our banner; our Conqueror.
• Jehovah Rapha: God our healer.
• Jehovah Raah: God our shepherd.
• Jehovah Shammah: God is here with us.
• Jehovah Tsidkenu: God our righteousness.
• Jehovah Shalom: God our peace.

Every one of these character-revealing names is deeply rooted in agape; without  perfect love, each of these qualities would not exist. Without perfect love God would have abandoned the self-serving, complaining Israelites in the desert.

Later their unfaithfulness and worship of idols drove Him from them for a time, but He always came back because of His unconditional love for them, longing to gather them “as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings”.  Because He wants the best for us.

To Clarify the Agape Form of Love

The love of  God that He pours into us; through us, bridges the gap.

The clearest representations of agape are in these verses:

“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” (John 3:16)

If you’re like me and probably most people, you just speed through that verse without contemplating its true meaning. We’ve heard it too much. Our brains check out the second we hear “For God so loved…”

But this is important.

The verse summarizes God’s attitude towards us. In every way possible, he always seeks the greatest good for us. Even to the point of downgrading to the physical realm of earth, living over 30 years in the filth of sweat, dirt and blood; and finally dying a death reserved for the worst of criminals.

“Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends.”

(John 15:13)

Christ’s masterpiece of the cross was the ultimate action of love. This was a love that did not come easily.

Acting in perfect love is no small task, especially at that level. Jesus asked the Father more than once if there was a different way, and he sweat drops like blood in the dread of anticipation. But he overcame the overwhelming temptation to avoid obedience; covering our sins for eternity and appointing us as priests, blameless and righteous before the Father.

And then there’s us.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’  But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you…”

-Jesus

And why on earth should we do that?

Who wants to exchange a friendly smile for an insult, or a prayer of blessing for someone who back-stabs you? It stretches the fabric of the mind to offer the left side of the face after someone has smacked the right. Think about that. The complete insult and humiliation, not to mention the outrageous transgression of personal boundaries. “My rights have been infringed upon!” That’s what we think �" “My rights, my emotional and physical health, my reputation.” Me, me, myself.

*Smack*

We read that verse and think “I’m really supposed to let someone do that to me? I have some dignity don’t I, some semblance of honor as a human and child of God?”

How is that okay? Again, why would we let someone do that to us?

It’s so we can be like our Father, so we can be sons and daughters in both inheritance and Spirit; so we can be perfect as our heavenly Father is perfect.

Just as our loving Father seeks the ultimate good of man, we should do the same. There’s no question about it, loving an enemy is not easy. Receiving God’s love is easy �" as easy as spending quality time with Him �" but acting in the love He gives can be an action requiring a willpower of iron.

Taking action in God’s love is a battle of willpower in which only one victor will emerge. Every time we’re faced with a turn-the-other-cheek situation, the bell rings and the fight begins.

It’s your spirit versus your flesh.

Yes it takes effort, often more than you have to give; but greater is He who is in you. Relying on God and His love will win the battle every time.

Agape works in pairs just like other gifts from the Spirit.

This is where it gets good. Really good.

These are the two greatest commandments;

“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.”

And,

“You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

That’s the pair system I’m talking about.

It starts with God in the supernatural. That’s the first part. Then, we become a bridge between Heaven and earth when we act in His perfect love.

Jesus said these two laws are the greatest because,

“on these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets.”

(Matt. 22:36-39)

That’s all we need to do to please God! Love Him and love our neighbor.

The Earth and the Tree

Let’s paint a clearer picture of perfect love.

First paint the earth; the entire globe in all of it’s natural beauty, then watch the tree growing out of it. Zoom in on that tree.

As the tree pushes it’s roots deep into the earth, the nutrients from the earth work their way from the roots, to the trunk, and into the branches and leaves, and fruit begin to form.

The branches give shelter to the birds, and the leaves protect the creatures beneath them from the sun and the rain. The fruits feed the animals around the tree, and animals come from far away to dine on the delicious and life-giving fruit.

The tree is the person and God is the earth.

As we root ourselves deeply in God, pursuing Him in diligence, pushing deeper and deeper, He fills us with His perfect love.

Love is two things: A gift, and an action.

Just as the tree pulls from what is not seen, we immerse ourselves in the things of God internally, out of the sight of others, by soaking deliberately in His holy word, praying and listening with passion and persistence, and worshipping Him with every fiber of our being.

The tree pulls the nutrients into the realm that it operates externally in, blessing the world around it. It takes in the nutrients through the roots and into the trunk, branches, leaves, and fruit. We allow God’s perfect love to manifest into the natural as we take action with the gift we have been given. By taken such action,  we bear the fruit of the Spirit and the gifts of the Spirit, which are fruits of perfect love.

Asking what perfect love is like asking what any gift from God is.

What is healing? It is the power of God that bears fruit as we take action with the gift; when we lay hands on the sick they are healed as the power of God is manifested in the natural.

What is prophecy? It is the power of God’s words planted in our hearts and manifested in the physical realm as we act on the word He gives us.

What is love? It is first, loving the Lord your God with all your mind, heart, soul, and strength. And when we take that love and act on it in the external world, we love our neighbors as ourselves. That’s all He asks.

“Love me with everything you’ve got, and love your neighbor as yourself.”

When we love God and serve others in His love, we fulfill every command God ever gave.

Agape makes us like God.

It makes us “perfect” in the way that our heavenly Father is perfect. We’ll use that word for now, but in a bit we’ll go over why the word we’ve translated as “perfect”, is not quite a… well not quite a perfect translation.

But the truer form of the word is just as impressive as the former.

Author's Note

I've included all original icons and graphics in the chapter so you can see the design I'm experimenting with. All encouragement, constructive feedback, and suggestions are welcome!

Reviews

[John Elridge Medlin]

I really enjoy this a lot! This is a conversation I have with my friends very often. Its one of my favorite things to talk about even. I see this as an amazing introduction to a great book. There were some grammatical issues or something early on. There were some quotation marks that slipped in that kind of threw me off. I like the list of different words in Greek for love. I have seen some of those before but not all. I really enjoy how you compared that to the ancient literature. Beautiful parallel.

As things continued to spin I couldnt help but to keep reading. Your voice is a firm one. It is engaging and interesting. While I personally know a lot of these things already, It is spelled out perfectly so it is accessible to everyone.