The Same

She takes out her pack

and lights a cigarette

as we sit on the cliffs

watching the ocean.

 

I take a drag, hand it back,

it seems surreal like a vignette.

"I'm done with all these ifs",

she says.  My mind is in commotion.

 

"But what of giving in and giving back,

of getting through this life beset

by those with fake motives

and painted on emotions."

 

"What is said is said, cut me some slack,

your beliefs and love are your assets,"

as if this reality is our tariff

for allowing this unending corrosion.

 

"What's done is done, it don't mean jack

so take your preaching to the pulpit,"

and she didn't have a care if

it led to humanity's erosion.

 

"It stays the same, changes we lack.",

she mouths as I look out on the tidal ocean.

"But how could it stay the same?" I ask,

"when this world is filled with so much motion."

 

Reviews

[Nik'aule]

A deep thought or contradicting epiphany painted in the brilliant colors of conversation. More than a male and a female sitting on a cliff, it feels more like two sides of a conscience hanging on the edge... one expects more from life, not understanding how it could not change if nature does; the other believes the age old adage, "There's nothing new under the sun", at least not as far as this humanity goes. Amazing write.

[Wildecat]

Excellent write, I can see why J. Black added this to her favorites, well done.

[J.Black]

Hmm this poem has depth, I really enjoyed it. There's so much hidden behind this poem with the girl and the boy whom share a drag. Is that ALL they share though? I gotta agree with Nik'aule. When I read this, it honestly did seem like the conscience of the two were hanging over the ledge of the rock pondering about life and what to gain from it. I figured I'd come read your old work because I like to see when writer's grow and what they develop into. This reminds me of the song "Oceans Avenue" by Yellowcard. It seems like such a teen thing... growing up and moving on. Great write!

[April Child]

Nice poem. You really capture the moment with the setting and the sharing the cigarette and then there's their conversation which seems to come from 2 different perspectives which is pretty apt really because that is all everything is, a perspective.

[justjenn_2u]

An deep and abstract poem!

your beliefs and love are your assets,"

A powerful line, how can we "own" love. So many people seem to hold it as a possession.

Wonderful poem! Thanks for sharing this one.

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

An intriquing conversation definitely - it leaves me wanting to hear more of what was said - that could not possible be the end of it...I believe you are right - there is much motion - it is not the same but in a constant state of flux - we try to hang on to things that do not change yet they do and we know not yet how to adapt to that which changes so swiftly before us. Thank you. Quite a nice write.
Light,
Siddartha

[O!]

HeY!!!.....i think its so cool how u rhymed the lines with the coinciding lines from the next verse!!.....quite clever u are!!....do u think that up to challenge urself?!...me like!...pity u didnt get it to perfection though....try again!!!!!!!!!!pls....im challenging u now! haha

and the poem....quite intriguing!

x,
O!

[Travis Lawrence]

This reminds me of a song by The Apples In Stereo, that goes "I stare into the ocean / and see its deep blue motion / always changing / never seems the same / whispering my name".

I really like it but I can't get a good grasp, for some reason. I think it's me, my mind is kind of dead today. I'll come back and read it again later.

[steve]

The Same is a beautiful piece. With such elegant words. The setting is vast and tranquil. Somewhat enchanting. Well done.

[Brandon Taylor-Black]

Powerful and very visual.
This is a fascinating write...the hits hard.
We often ponder what to do, why we feel the way we feel and so on...the basic answer is...because we do.
Bravo!