My Own Heart of Glass

Watching a Hallmark movie

Brought me to that song by Blondie

Once I had a love and it was a gas

All I have is the pieces of this heart of glass

I heard God fast

I blocked him forever at last

I always told you

Now I know i am like the girl calling wolf

Even with the besties they don't believe

Inside me I long for his kiss, for his touch, to be lost in his breath

but I realize it will just continue this endless feeling of dread

I love you but I am no side piece in the end

He always called me princess

but never saw the potential queen blend

I was in the season of dumb

I am still thankful because it can still teach so much

I must walk away

i can't stay here

I hope you know i am ok

Iam now safe

I have escaped

your love is demented and a cage

for me and for you

I refuse to be black and blue

I break my own heart of glass

to be free at last

you think you are happy

but he lives a lie and a life so crappy

I cant stay beside and pretend its nice

i want that hallmark movie

of you and me kissing forever under Christmas in the park lights

but you refuse to be mine

So all the love I have for you I give it to Him as I disappear for all time

In the end the silver line is i am free at last and I will be fine

But it hurts tonight knowing I break my own heart of glass forever with pain inside

I am thankful as I felt the pain in the night and the daylight

I am awake this time

I wont fall asleep so easily

even as he calls my name saying if I blocked him he understands

why then leave a message and why does Apple keep it saved

I will do my best to fast erase

still I remember the sweet feeling of embrace

but God whispers my beloved it just isn't safe

keep your eyes on me I will fill your heartless body with grace

the pain won t stay

as the tears drop away because I am free at last

I broke my own heart of glass