left behind

left behind

A Poem by joshua deathdealer
"

06/2012

"
yea it's okay
         she has just 
lost her way
          while I've been
searching for the 
           most unseen
 
I've been embracing
           tragedy and many pains
from many things that
            we can't conquer

one lie after another
            never a moment
of solid ground
            nor contentment 

inside out I stood
            in the devouring
flame as she fell 

upside down
             like everything
around her  

             slowly to her death
taking her love
            away from me

so very
           far away 
from me

© 2012 joshua deathdealer


Author's Note

joshua deathdealer


My Review

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Featured Review

Ouch...if I didn't have such a good memory this poem might not hit me at such an emotional level...This form is new in your writing, at least to me and I like it. The drum beat in the song reminds me a bit of the form, in a good way.
You always seem to nail your emotions with lyrics and phrasing that draws in the reader even though the emotions are dark...Nicely done Joshua

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Ouch. The pain is felt by the reader as expressed by the writer I enjoy the font play - it conveys much as well. To hoping this is a write only, but feels more than that. Thought are with you young man.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I really like the structure of this piece. It shows how one can play around with poems and have the aesthetic go along with the linguistic. This flows like a song and has a wonderful lyrical sense to it. "Inside out I stood / in the devouring / flame as she feel" is a really brilliant line. It creates a powerful image and the rest of the piece follows suit with that. Very nice!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Awe, this was a sad, but cute piece. The feeling in this piece everyone can relate to if they are missing someone they love. It was a great write. I loved it!!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Stats

2006 Views
53 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 4 Libraries
Added on June 8, 2012
Last Updated on June 10, 2012
Tags: romance, sad, dark, love

Author

joshua deathdealer
joshua deathdealer

Casket City, FL



About
"My trepidation of things past is not a song with a beginning, middle and end. But an endless symphony playing infinite variations on the same theme. One day of sadness fades into another and the .. more..

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