the greedy dragon

the greedy dragon

A Chapter by joshua deathdealer
"

12/2011 (Fantasy Installment Four)

"
Wyvern rule the skies this far out
Circling battles wage behind the 
gold dragon as his massive wings
slices though the frigid morning 

After weeks of marauding the
ports and shoreline cities of
the south, the treasure laden 
behemoth was lair bound

He had flown quite a distance
and now before him lay the
immense frozen sea, the last 
hurtle before his cavernous home

His squat rider suggests tossing
some of the heavy loot that is tied
securely around the dragons waist
To help relieve his strained flight 

Nonsense, he snorts and maneuvers
over the vast body of frozen waves
Pushing his aching wings he climbs
high and speedily towards looming cliffs

The weight of precious stones and
countless gold bars begin to take an 
evident toll on the laboring beast
His breath shudders under the stress

The air around the greedy dragon 
slows, his shoulders lock and he starts 
to plummet towards the unforgiving icy expanse  
Screams are replaced by a sickening thwack 

      


© 2011 joshua deathdealer


Author's Note

joshua deathdealer
"Shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?"

My Review

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Featured Review

Dear joshua deathdealer,

The last stanza is a little confusing. Who's screams? The rider and the dragon? Did they both fall? The fight of the dragons must symbolize the dog-eats-dog thing going on in our society today. You seemed to have made the man considerate, which is opposite of greedy, though? Is it the greediness of the dragon that causes the fall? Then what's the point of the man? Or are the two one like the werewolf where there is conflict between beast and man?

I liked this line, though, "the heavy loot that is that is tied securely around the dragon's waist" to show that our security in riches often leads us to a fall because they provide no security at all, for riches eventually fail us.

Thanks for sharing!

Sincerely Livana Lowell (LL)

God bless

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

serves him right heh? nice story, nice moral point. creative and called forth the visuals for me. Thanks.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


Evocative write, you created an entire fantasy world in this piece. Your fantasy world driven style is great, I'd sure enjoy more like this. /97

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

woah! made me think of Harry potter!
fantasy! cool! :D

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I like your series Joshua..each one a little jewel..

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

inspirational!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

great poem, love the subject matter and the strong words used, which balances well together.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Powerfully penned .. :)

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Good work..!!!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Great work, Joshua...I love the flow from each and every line here... :)))
Well done, Mr. Super FB Poker!
xD

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I like the way you give greed the face of a Dragon. Well done.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on December 1, 2011
Last Updated on December 8, 2011
Tags: fantasy, greed, dragon, metaphoric


Author

joshua deathdealer
joshua deathdealer

Casket City, FL



About
"My trepidation of things past is not a song with a beginning, middle and end. But an endless symphony playing infinite variations on the same theme. One day of sadness fades into another and the .. more..

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