deadlock

08/2011

                                  The storm rages outside as I lay

                                    motionless in this twisted joke of a bed

                                     and the great war wages in my mind

                                     Lighting cracks and thunder crashes

                                    as the winds shakes this feeble abode

                                   all I can see is the wraith in my face

                                   Flashes reveals its form and the 

                                    menacing creatures that are crawling

                                      dazed I am held within their limbo

                                       I wish I could rip myself from their

                                     wires that are attached to my body and

                                    take a fresh breath of uncontrolled air

Author's Note

Thanks to Muse for an edit help on this one...xx

Reviews

[((Teenage_Poet_Loser))]

i was reading this and the band as i lay dying, i dont know if you know them, poped into my head! if you expand this make a cool chorus it hink they will actually be stunned by this!
i liked it! it was short to the point and easy to read. So i liked it a lot =] thanx for the share! great work

[Rene Velez]

Really cool wording here...haunting

[ShadowOfTheDay]

I love this! I am inpressed! Very good job :)

[Pebbles]

brilliant write Joshua ...love the darkness you weave into your words

[Lily Mae]

It feels like static electricity...or wait maybe that's my crazy a*s energy lately:) lol. I love this..xx

[Alicia Hirshey]

This sent electric chills down through me. Great job(:

[Angie Diane♥&hea..]

Whoa....well that sent shivers down my spine o.o
Well the last lines did anyway....it was very emotional indeed...I loved it! Thanks for sharing!!!

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

This sounds like the battle between the mind and the heart. Well penned!

[...]

This is such a n emotional read, I enjoyed the write.
I could feel this, well done.

[Amila Jay]

trying to break free from the real world. nice poem!!