drowning it out

07/2011

I stagger aloof around this social setting
unbalanced and full of hard liquor
dripping with sweet supercilious
shrouded in my cloak of not caring
pushing all the feelings of resentment
deep into the recesses of my soul
this is my night of counterfeit relief
my time of blinding my rendered heart
the days of caring and hoping are over
the cover of darkness will be my escape
shots of shine accent my swift fall
into this abyss of self destruction
the alcohol that courses through my veins
mask the pain that cause my body to contort 
I've been left to my own blunders
abandoned to cavort under a gawking sun
dismissed to wreak havoc using my distaste
my fury will carry me over and away

Reviews

[Megan]

I can seriously relate to this. While I don't drink I do have a strong desire to do something to replace this ache that I feel. Haha as you might have already noticed I smoke and while that helps it doesn't always do the job like I'd like it to. Plus I don't have the funds to carry on such a habit. But I do know that pain and I do know that desire to make it stop..at least for a moment and sometimes it seems like stopping it for that moment with whatever it takes is worth the consequences we'll have to face later. Something I have learned though..facing the pain and pushing through it, even though it hurts is so much better in the end. Because if you do that, the pain will go away for forever! :)
Lovely write joshua and thank you for sharing

[Kaylor Mason]

Booze--always a cure that turns worse than the disease. Nicely written. I especially like the text color--like looking through bloodshot eyes and thinking through a red haze of rage and pain