Beautiful Child

Some will, most won't, goodbye.

Beautiful Child

 

 

Carli was a beautiful child

Everyone said

Almost survived childhood

Her brother was damaged

Her mother was hurt

Her father was absent, calling it work

I met Carli over coffee

With fifty other alkies

She took her first step towards helping herself

Got stuck somewhere between honesty and willingness

Pills and peace

Pain and relief

Her eyes remained haunted

We saw her less and less

It’s easy to lose some

To indifference

The disconnect happens before you even realize

What happened to what’s her name?

No one really knows and the conversation moves on

Carli showed up again

And again

And again

Skinnier and more pale each time

Her hands shook when you held them

Cold, clammy, insubstantial

The other ladies reach out and at times she seems hopeful

But the news always broke like an unwanted storm

Carli’s in Texas or New York

Rehab in California

Jail in Mississippi

In love with her married boss

Always a drama

A trauma

A problem

We are problem people but that makes the reality no less heartbreaking

The longer I’m sober the more I hate funerals

Tina got the call yesterday

The mother was distraught

Found Carli dead in a shower in a motel in Phoenix

Her lover left her and flew home to his wife and children

Her father is working

Her brother doesn’t understand

She was such a beautiful child

Author's Note

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Reviews

amazing, i loved the way you used the words. it was deep and meaningful. it was beatiful.

[Frank F. Atanacio]

a very well written piece I loved it